Beware of Foul-Weather Friends

" WHEN trouble comes, your foul-weather friend knows you are good old reliable you, the one who will listen when no one else will, and they act like you're their only friend. Don't expect the same in return. When you've got a problem, they'll usually tell you not to bring them down."

I never had one of those until recently, so I was completely taken in and am now left out in the cold. (Not really, it's just an expression.)

We became friends when her marriage was on the rocks. She was over here often, complaining ad nauseam about the sick husband and the old, cranky mother who she wished would die already so she could get the huge inheritance. I heard about her two "selfish" daughters too, and how they weren't showing her any respect, thought only of themselves, and blah blah. (Coincidence?)

Finally she walked out of her marriage and moved into an apartment nearby. My husband and I helped her move her stuff, loaned her some furniture to fill the place out, and had her over to dinner frequently. Complaining, complaining, yada yada. But hey, divorce is hard, I know.

She moved again. We helped again. She was always free in the evenings so dinners here and there all the time. Phone calls were frequent, especially when she needed advice about her crumbling life, which was always.

Not long after leaving her cancer-ridden husband of 34 years, she met a new man. It was need at first sight -- he was divorced and lonely too -- and they started seeing one another constantly. Apparently it was true love, and we heard all the gory details and sappy texts. Finally we met the guy and hit it off, and were truly happy for them both. 

Now they're engaged and he moved in. The phone calls have stopped altogether. I literally can't remember the last time I saw her. But I do remember our last conversation about six or seven weeks ago when she called asking for favor. When I shared that I had Covid and was not feeling very well, she told me not to be a Debby Downer and just say I'm fine. (She's a nurse.)

So now we are no longer "friends." The only good part is that I got to throw out all the  handmade beaded necklaces she gave me over the years as "gifts," again and again and again, even though I never wore one once so you'd think she'd get the message. But no, she made those necklaces because it was fun for her and she never had to ponder what possible gift I might really like.

If you have two or three good friends who don't sound like the woman described above, cherish them. Fortunately I do, and I do.