Wednesday, February 11, 2026

Tucson's Keystone Cops

Tucson police chief on the phone with Nancy Guthrie's neighbor.

If you are currently earning living as a petty criminal or are considering a life of crime, you would do well to move to the city of Tucson, Arizona, where the police department is staffed with nitwits. How else to explain that it took a phone call from a neighbor, more than a week after Nancy Guthrie went missing, to alert them that there was a surveillance camera installed on the roof of her home? 

What that makes clear to me is that not one of them saw the movie The Hangover, where the missing man (Dougie) was ultimately found to be passed out on the roof of the hotel where he was staying. And for that reason alone, they cannot be trusted. 

Sunday, February 8, 2026

Lindsey Makes A Comeback

Oopsie!
After five years in retirement, 41-year-old Lindsey Vonn was back, hoping for Olympic gold in Italy. But it was not to be. Instead, she crashed out yesterday after 13 seconds into her publicized downhill run, just nine days after she ruptured the ACL in her left knee. Her right knee was already partially replaced with a titanium plate. Like who didn't see that coming?

Today Vonn's fans are busy applauding her bravery. Others say she usurped a spot on the USA ski team that should have gone to a young hopeful who might actually have won. So much for a comeback....

Saturday, February 7, 2026

Life Goes On

Back when Savannah was happier.
According to several statistics websites, about 600,000 people go missing in the United States every year, which represents the most missing persons cases reported worldwide. While most of them are resolved fairly quickly, some remain open for decades. About 25,000 cases remain unsolved today.

With all due respect to Nancy Guthrie, the mother of TV anchor Savannah Guthrie who was abducted last Sunday, it's pretty crazy that her case has been covered non-stop every day since then, at the level of intensity one would expect for a world war or global plague.

My husband never heard of Savannah Guthrie before this happened. I had heard her name but never saw her even once, despite her being the host of the Today show for the last 14 years.  (I don't watch it.) So she's not some colossal star. What then explains the continuous TV coverage of this story? For some reason it's drawing in the public and thus making big bucks for the networks.

While it's been hard to pull myself away -- after all, I'm only human -- I'm pretty much done with it.  Enough already! I think Savannah should dry her tears, put on some makeup, pack a bag and hop a jet to Italy where she was supposed to be covering the Olympics and get back to it before her career is forever tainted.

Friday, February 6, 2026

If He Did It

You may remember OJ's book entitled "If I Did It," in which he detailed how he would have killed his wife Nicole Brown Simpson and her friend Ron Goldman, if he had. Inspired by that, I hereby theorize how Savannah Guthrie's brother-in-law, Tommaso Cioni, would have abducted her, if he had. And based on my years studying at SVU University under professors Olivia Benson and Eliot Stabler, I feel confident I'm correct.

Cioni wouldn't have done the dirty deed himself. Instead, he would have hired two goons from Mexico, which is just an hour away from Tucson where the abduction occurred. He would have given them the key to the house and a floor plan of where everything was located, including Nancy Guthrie's bedroom and the interior cameras.

Sadly, I must say that this theory supposes the goons killed Nancy and hid her body somewhere in the desert in Mexico. Then Ciono crafted the ransom notes.

The reason the reward is so low is that Cioni did it for the inheritance he and his wife, Nancy's other daughter, would receive, and thus did not want to drain the coffers. So he advised the family to offer a small reward, and for some reason they agreed.

That's it. 


Thursday, February 5, 2026

My Money's On the Brother-in-Law


Just sayin'....

 

Fat People Die Young. Then What?


There is a disturbing trend online of extremely, absurdly, nauseatingly obese young women showing us their bodies, some half-naked in their underwear, and claiming how happy they are with themselves. I thought I had seen everything, but then a new phase began: Fatties showing the world what they eat in a day.

A typical Reel shows a 30-something woman with a smiling face, albeit a fat one, with these words imprinted over her:" THIS IS WHAT I EAT IN A DAY AS A FAT GIRL." Like we all want to know so we can get as fat as you, right?

Then it's breakfast, of maybe a stack of pancakes with syrup, three sausages, some scrambled eggs, a couple of chocolate-cream donuts and a strawberry Smoothie. Next it's on to lunch time, with a large pepperoni pizza, two hot dogs, an ice-cream sandwich and a Diet Coke. (It's always a Diet Coke. Go figure.) The video continues, but I've never made it past the afternoon snack because of being too sad to watch. 

As if all that isn't bad enough, the comments on these videos applaud their makers' seeming self-love. Two things about this trend bother me. First, obesity is appalling and wrong, unhealthy, ungodly and just plain stupid. Second, who will run the country when all these fatties die in their 40s and 50s?

Tuesday, February 3, 2026

How the White Man Got Manhattan

After running a few ideas past him for my next blog post, my husband rejected them all and said I should try to write about something "cheery." My suggestions had included the current news story about an 84-year-old woman who was abducted from her bed in the middle of the night, how long it takes to get an appointment with a doctor these days, and how after 39 years of marriage we have run out of even trivial conversation.

Fine, I said, give me just one cheery idea. This was his reply: "The sap in the trees is rising, the days are getting longer and we are going to Florida in a few weeks." This may be why Mitch does not have his own blog.

The cold, hard truth is that there's hardly any cheer left in America these days. About the only thing I can think of is that in today's mail I received a crisp one dollar bill from a charitable organization (see photo) seeking my donation, along with the customary note pad and return address labels. I found that to be cheery, although oddly counter-productive. 

I am seriously considering contributing one dollar to their cause. That should fix their wagon.

Monday, February 2, 2026

Ordinary People Outshine Hollywood Weirdos

Justin Bieber, playing in his undies.
This morning I worked out for an hour at my CrossFit gym. The place was rocking as the 10am class got underway: Music blaring, weights clanking, the hum of rowing machines, bikes and Assault runners adding to the crescendo of sound. Over it all was the voice of the trainer shouting out instructions. It was glorious.

Everyone there -- about 20 people when I arrived -- was focused on self-improvement. They showed up for that and that alone. As an added bonus to staying healthy and avoiding a creaky old age, friendships form and socialization occurs. It's a complete good-for-you package.

None of the people at my gym are famous. They are not asked for their autographs and the paparazzi don't follow them around. They're all just ordinary people striving to become their best selves, without the need for awards, applause or adoration from complete strangers.

Afterwards I came home and checked my email and was bombarded with photos of last night's Grammy Awards show, which mercifully I did not see. The people shown were seemingly nuts. One man (Justin Bieber, has-been musician) sang and played guitar totally naked except for boxer shorts and socks, the better to see his tattoo-covered chest, arms and back. A woman (Heidi Klum, has-been supermodel) wore a 100% plastic, flesh-colored, super-tight dress in which she was unable to walk or sit. Several women (unknown to me) wore next-to-nothing gowns which barely covered their breasts and were obviously meant to titillate onlookers rather than clothe the wearers.

It seems plainer than ever to me that Hollywood is home to the most insecure and mentally unstable of our species, each one seeking to gain the most attention and steal the spotlight. I wondered how any of them would fare at my little CrossFit gym, where nobody is better than anyone else and every participant is a superstar.

Saturday, January 31, 2026

Film Review: MELANIA

First of all, let me say I have not enjoyed a movie this much in a long, long time. Every cinematic aspect of Melania is compelling, including the imaginative directing by Brett Ratner (of the "Rush Hour" movies), the crisp and unexpected editing, and most of all the truly great musical score, a mix of pop hits and classical works. 

It is also informative, showing you things you've wondered about and always wanted to see. If you drop your politics at the door and think of it as an inside look at the life of a Princess in a fairy tale leading up to the day her Prince is crowned, you'll love it!

Of course it isn't fiction, it's a documentary about what a First Lady does all day, and this one in particular. You'll find out, and learn a little about fashion on the way, as Melania plans her outfits and gown for the big event and all the hoopla surrounding it. You'll also get a glimpse at the Trump's lavishly decorated New York apartment (definitely not for the faint of heart), a few stunning drone shots over Mar-A-Lago (as well as a look inside), and a romp through the White House, fancy invitation-only dinner and presidential residence included.

Besides the beautiful visuals, which are always interesting and often include random shots unrelated to the subject, there's Melania herself, telling us in a voiceover what's going on. There's lots of pomp and circumstance leading up to Trump's second Inauguration Day, much more than I ever realized. While the elaborate protocols and traditions seem a bit over the top, remember it's all been similarly scripted for every new past president. Every one of them did it, not just the Trumps, so leave your judge's robe at home and just take it all in. It's pretty much fun!

Good Things About Maine

Not much traffic

It snows in winter

Spectacular fall foliage

Eighty-8 Donut Cafe

Acadia National Park

Plenty of parking


Friday, January 30, 2026

The Wrong People Keep Dying


First it was Diane Keaton. 
Then it was Rob Reiner. 
Now it's Catherine O'Hara. 

Three talented actors who made us laugh and died far too soon, 
sooner than some people who make us hate. 

For example, Ilhan Omar still walks among us.
And how about Vladimir Putin? 

Death chooses randomly, that's all we know for sure.

Tucson's Keystone Cops

Tucson police chief on the phone with Nancy Guthrie's neighbor. If you are currently earning living as a petty criminal or are consideri...