So many jobs taken, so many deadlines met, so many turkeys stuffed and laundry folded and paintings shown and presents wrapped and important functions not to be late for. Now I have little reason to be on time anywhere.
This time will pass, I'm guessing. Until then, there's always another painting waiting for more paint.
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| Average Maine Democrat. |
Just yesterday one of the signs was found on the ground, torn to pieces. It followed the MO of the typical Democrat around these parts: someone impossible to reason with because of their blind allegiance to The Party. These are, after all, the very same people who voted for Kamala Harris for president, if you can wrap your head around that one, and would vote for Socialist wacko Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, should she make a run for it in 2028.
Putting it plainly, most Mainers are mean -- in fact they should be called Meaners -- and the Democrats are the worst of the lot. A perfect example can be found on Hupper Island, an idyllic car-free refuge 90 miles north of Portland. About two dozen families spend their summers there, and Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr. has been one of them for the past 20 years. Until recently he was a good friend to all the other islanders, helping them out in times of need and partying together at the Independence Day annual picnic.
Not anymore. These days Roberts is shunned by all, with some people insulting him publicly. One particularly vindictive woman has taken to kayaking back and forth in front of his island getaway with a sign that reads "Justice For All," inferring that he is responsible for justice for none because of his Supreme Court decisions impacting abortion, immigrants and transgenders.
Maine's state's slogan is, "The Way Life Should Be." That's definitely outdated. Instead it should be, "Life Our Way or Get The Fuck Out."
This morning this headline caught my eye on an online news site: "This New England beach town is an affordable alternative to the Hamptons." Since I live in New England and have visited the Hamptons on vacation more than once, I clicked. Alas, the story was riddled with errors. The supposed "beach town" in New England is not only NOT a beach town but it isn't in New England, not even close.
Turned out the story was about Shelter Island, out on the end of Long Island in New York. And to make matters worse, it is not affordable at all, unless you are extremely wealthy. It is beautiful, I've been there a few times but never thought of it as a "beach town." It's not at all as descried in the article that is printed as factual on a news website.
The other day I saw a video of a dance number in which Judy Garland was identified as Ann Reinking. The only thing those two have in common is they are both dead.
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| Tony Soprano at target practice. |
Yesterday the state of Tennessee tried to execute a woman who murdered someone 30 years ago, simply because she "felt mean" that day. (She slashed her victim's throat and crushed her skull with a rock, keeping a piece of it as a souvenir.) Imprisoned since then, finally the day came when they were to rid society of the soulless monster they had been feeding, clothing, housing and caring for over the last three decades, at the taxpayer's expense.
They strapped her to a gurney and began injecting some chemical cocktail into her veins intended to shut down her organs, only it didn't work. She continued to breathe and could be heard snoring. So they wrapped her up and sent her to a local hospital, where I suppose they will make her well enough to try killing her again.
If only they had watched The Sopranos they would know that you can end a life in a nano-second with a bullet to the head, or maybe the heart. Bada-bing, it's over -- no fuss, no mess. (Well, some mess.)
Jesus, who's in charge around here?
She gets all this money for running around a gymnasium dribbling a big bouncy ball and tossing it into a high, rimmed net every so often. Pretty nice gig, if you ask me. But wait, there's a downside: She will not tolerate anyone pointing at her! After all, she is black and we know that black lives matter, and pointing at someone must mean they don't matter. Right?
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| A'ja cries after the pointing. |
1. I get out of bed in the morning to drink coffee. It is my main motivation.
2. People who don't drink coffee cannot be trusted. What's wrong with them?
3. I take my coffee black and immediately like people who do the same.
4. People who add cream and sugar to their coffee are not adults. They are having a baby drink, which BTW adds hundreds of calories to their diets over time.
5. If a doctor told me I had to stop drinking coffee I would get a new doctor.
6. Patrons of Starbucks who order specialty drinks like Spiced Pumpkin Lattes or Chai Tea Mochas or God Knows What Double Frappuccinos are posers.
7. I prefer American coffee to coffee in any foreign country I have visited, including all of Europe, Canada and Haiti.
8. Coffee does not keep me up at night.
9. Decaf coffee is almost always gross and instant coffee is truly despicable.
10. Coffee should always be brewed using freshly ground beans.
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| Not all Furries are cuddly! |
I may be a lot of things, but crazy isn't one of them. I am judgmental, sarcastic and often depressed. I suffer from hyper-empathy and a firm belief that I know better than most people how to do things the right way, but as a native New York Jew surrounded by many Mainers who proudly declare they have never left the state, it's likely the case. And oh yes, I can be imperious.
But, as I say in the title, I am not crazy. And you know who is? Furries who identify as animals, and not just animals but stuffed animals, and transgenders who think they can undo God's work, and Maine's elected leaders who have chosen to distribute clean needles to heroin addicts and Narcan nasal sprays to opiate users to avoid an overdose. (That's called enabling, by the way.)
I wonder, if I were to buy some would my cat get younger? Would the incision on my nose heal sooner than the 12 weeks I was told to expect? How, exactly, would it benefit me? And if it wouldn't, why do they keep hawking it?
Celebrity endorsements have always mystified me. This one's favorite lasagna recipe, that one's favorite bedroom slippers -- it goes on and on. Does anyone think that using a product with a movie star's name attached will improve their lot in life? And if so, who are those people? How does someone get that way?
My cat, and I say my cat but really he is my son's cat who we took in 16 years ago "for a few months" until he got situated, sits at the door, desperate to go out into the darkness where there might be rabid raccoons, or foxes, or bats, according to the local neighborhood chat page online, but I remain unmoved. I wonder, would Oprah's favorite mascara make him feel better? Maybe I should order some.
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| Amy's spirit lives on in our food processor! |
When we called a repairman for our dryer a few years ago, he bluntly said it was not fixable, adding that, "These days appliances are built to last between six and eight years." When the fan in our built-in microwave stopped working, we learned that they don't make that part anymore, forcing us to install a whole new unit.
So you see, our Braun food processor is a champ. It has gotten constant use bordering on abuse, considering the number of cookies, cakes, pies, soups and stews it has been called upon for chopping, grinding, pureeing and mashing for 39 Thanksgivings and Passovers, countless birthdays and too-many-to-count platters of guacamole, hummus, eggplant salad and spinach dip with nary a break in the action.
Sadly, our dear friend Amy who gave us the food processor died two years ago, but her generous gift is still going strong. Kudos to Braun: those Germans certainly know how to do things right, even when they're doing something terribly wrong.
Wrong. Sometimes it is a big deal. Like in my case, where the surgeon must have used a melon baller to eradicate the basal carcinoma cells from the bridge of my nose.
That was yesterday. Today, with my gradually blackening right eye half-shut and a giant bandage covering most of my nose, I look like I was in the ring with Mike Tyson and guess who won. And yes, it hurts.
Just sayin'.
1. I was kidnapped at the age of four (by a white woman).
2. I was mugged by four young (black) men in a supermarket parking lot while making a call inside a pay phone cubicle. They roughed me up and stole my money, about $19.00.
3. My car was stolen by, according to several witnesses, a (black) man.
4. A (black) teenager attempted to enter my apartment at night from the fire escape but ran off when the police, who I summoned, arrived.
5. A close friend and his wife were murdered inside their home by two (black) men in a robbery gone wrong.
6. My high-school aged son was beaten by a group of (Hispanic) youths and had to be hospitalized.
7. While shopping in Macy's during a trip to NYC, the strap of my shoulder bag was cut with scissors by an older black lady (according to the store detectives who cited her as part of a shoplifting ring they had been following for years), leaving me stranded with nothing.
8. A pregnant friend and her husband were terrorized inside their ground-floor apartment by two young (black) men who entered through an open window. She was raped and he was tied up and forced to watch.
None of these crimes were committed by Jews. Yet Jews, who have contributed so much to the world in the areas of science, literature, business, medicine, technology and the arts, are now the objects of hatred in the world, scorned and mistreated and even hurt or killed, while black people are treated as objects of pity, deserving of money for their ancestors' past mistreatment, and given government handouts of food, housing, daycare and rent reductions.
Can you name a time a Jew hurt you? And when was the last time you had a bagel? (Invented by Jews.)
I am deep into a period of doing nothing and have been for awhile. In fact, I can sit and do nothing for hours at a time, much of it spent w...
