I will miss Melania the most. Her class, her beauty, her grace, her calm demeanor, and most of all her clothes. As beautiful as any movie star, she presented herself with a regal bearing and unflappable dignity under all circumstances. Yeah, yeah, I know -- her detractors love pointing out that she posed nude back in her modeling days. So what? She's a perfect specimen, show it off I say. Yet not once in five years did
Vogue magazine, that monthly catalog of products aimed at women and gay men with too much money and time on their hands, photograph her. Even though ugly Michelle Obama was on their cover three times, with huge photo spreads inside. How petty can you get? I guess
Vogue Editor-in-Chief Anna Wintour can get damn petty.
Now here comes Miss Frump. She will surely get a makeover before the Inauguration. (God knows she needs it.) Below are some of her least memorable outfits, showing she is ready for a variety of jobs, none of which are First Lady:
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School Crossing Guard
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Beautician
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ICU Nurse
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Hospital Administrator
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High-school Prom Chaperone
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IRS Auditor
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Munchkin in "The Wizard of Oz"
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Kotex Sales Rep
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Circus Clown
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