Early Morning TV

Unable to sleep because of a bad head cold, I finally got out of bed and turned on the television for some distraction. Here's what I found out:

The British government is spending 30 million dollars on security for the coming wedding of Prince Whatsit and his girlfriend. Could that really be true? Do they have that much money--and so many cops-- in England? Also, in case of bad weather, the couple will ride through the streets in a glass-topped carriage, the very same one used by Princess Di and Prince Charles. Following the ceremony between these two ordinary folks who go to the bathroom just like you and I, all church bells across London will peal for three hours.

Faith healer Peter Popoff is curing people with miracle spring water direct from God! Apparently just by rubbing the stuff on your hernia, you are cured. Testimony came from several believers: One woman drank it and instantly got a job after looking for work for many years. After a lifetime of paralysis, an older lady jumped up from her wheelchair from ingesting the stuff, and one couple even "got" their dream home right after they started using the water! I'm betting Mr. Popoff gets a lot from that water too.

Mesothelioma is apparently rampant in our society, and is killing all of our loved ones. Several law firms specialize in suing whoever is responsible.

Many people with diabetes still want to eat cake, candy, cookies and ice cream, despite the fact that it is potentially toxic for them to do so. Now, just by ordering a special Diabetic Cook Book, they can eat bad foods all the time, at least according to the pitch woman who was Miss America in 1999 and has been a diabetic her whole life. She was on the chubby side and looked quite healthy, so obviously those recipes really do the trick.

The best thing I learned: In England, they say "if it does bucket down" when they mean if it rains. Cute.