A man in Birmingham, England died in a movie theater when he attempted to retrieve the cell phone he dropped under his seat and the reclining seat mechanism jammed, trapping him under it and causing him to have a heart attack. On the floor, at the movies, with all the sticky soda and popcorn. What a way to go.
A young woman went for a swim at the pool in her apartment complex wearing a one-piece bathing suit, but since she had a rather large rear, not all of it was covered by the suit. Other people at the pool approached her and said she would have to leave immediately because too much of her body was revealed in that bathing suit, and there were teenage boys at the pool who might have sexual thoughts about her. As if they wouldn't have sexual thoughts if her bathing suit fit better. Teenage boys. Sexual thoughts.
The former head of the CDC during the Obama administration has been arrested after a 55-year-old woman said he "grabbed her buttocks" in her Brooklyn apartment last October. Oh, and she didn't want him to, so now he is in jail. For grabbing a woman's ass. In jail. She's 55. Oy.
A man killed his wife and two young daughters because he was $70,000 in debt and had to declare bankruptcy. Now he's going to live in jail forever and have three meals a day and all the medical care he ever needs, and not have that annoying wife and those pesky little girls to deal with. Oh well, finally a happy ending.
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