Someone Different for President

Justice Sotomayor in a schleppy coat.

Yesterday Michael Bloomberg officially entered the race for the Democratic nomination for president, and I think that's great. The fact that he is brilliant, Jewish and rich -- he's earned $54 billion during his lifetime -- implies a level of confidence and know-how the office could use.

Not everyone feels that way, though. Sen. Amy Klobuchar, who lacks either the time or the money to fix her annoying lisp, considers his wealth to be a negative. During an ABC-TV interview, she said about Bloomberg's chances as another rich person running for office, "I don't think voters are going to buy that. I think they want someone different."

Okay, someone different, let's see. Oh, I know --we could elect a homeless drug addict to run things. There certainly are a lot of those out there, and God knows they've got the time. Or maybe an unemployed high-school dropout eking out a living working nights at a call center. Or a professional gardener or beautician? They would all be "someone different."

No kidding, maybe it is time for the little people to run things. Just think how life would be if an average American sat in the driver's seat: Vouchers for beer and pizza would be given to every voter at the ballot box at every election; that would get people to show up! And no more of those ridiculously complicated tax forms. Instead, all the money in Monopoly games stowed in basements everywhere would become legal tender and you could send that in every so often. Reality stars would comprise the cabinet, and we could vote them out if we didn't like their act. Supreme Court justices could wear regular clothes instead of those meaningless robes that just make them look hoity-toity and, to be honest, silly.

Who knows, living in America might be fun again.