Last Minute Thoughts on Turkey Day

So are we supposed to celebrate Thanksgiving or not? Seems like it's a hung jury. Some people cling to the belief that the pilgrims and the Indians (sue me -- I will never call them Indigenous Peoples no matter what the Thought Police decree) got along famously and feasted together in friendship and peace that first year. Others say the gun-wielding white man slaughtered the Indians by the thousands, and so what's to celebrate about that? And still others say the Indians were certainly no angels, given to scalping their enemies alive and performing other horrid acts that were way worse than a shot to the heart, so we'll just keep calling the Redskins the Redskins and too bad for them.

 Any way you slice it, those early days here in the New World were a veritable blood bath, with little good to commemorate them. Eating a lot of one species of bird only adds to the unpleasantness. Personally, I am in favor of banning the eating of turkey on this holiday we call Thanksgiving. What did they ever do to anyone? At the very least we should be eating either pilgrims or Indians, depending on whether you prefer light meat or dark meat, and cooked first of course.