Sure you’re crazy, I tell myself, but who isn’t? I mean,
consider the terms: You’re born, you’re the center of attention, everyone makes
a big fuss, takes care of your every need. You eat, sleep, grow, and get
excited about things, like the snow and the circus and Christmas coming up.
Life is great. In fact, you struggle against sleep each night because it’s so
much fun just being awake. Then one day -- one minute -- you don’t know
(although I can’t remember not knowing, there must have been a time) and the
next minute you do: Everything ends! The whole shebang! And not just for you,
but for everyone you know. The mailman, your parents, the crazy lady down the
street, everyone in the supermarket, even famous people: Everyone dies!
So you
say, "Okay, I can handle it, just tell me when." And they say,
"The funny thing is, nobody knows, it could be any day now. Of course,
some people have been known to last a hundred years or more." You go on but it’s not the same, and life becomes the daily
sweepstakes. Gee, I wonder who died today? Hey, here’s a list in the newspaper,
these people think of everything. There’s even something called "life
insurance" for after you go, except then it’s too late to do you any good.
It’s enough to make anyone crazy.
So they started having doctors for this sort
of thing, this Awareness of Truth Syndrome that could cut you down in your
prime. Psychiatrists, psychologists, witch doctors, priests, call them what you
will, it all boils down to the same thing: Here’s my life, doc, what should I
do with it? And what if I die before I do anything at all?
But the doc doesn’t know the answers any more than you do.
He’s got the same terms, since there is no other plan available. There is only
Plan A: Birth, Life, and Death, details varied and unspecified. So really, the
shrinks just act like they know. But what a performance -- some people even pay
to see it.
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