Art For Sale

 I submitted the oil paintings shown above to a local juried show here in Maine. 

Still waiting to see if any are accepted. 

Let me know if you like any or have a favorite.

Who Needs A President Anyway?

Right. now, this minute, who is in charge? Do we have a President today? It certainly isn't Joe Biden, who's been MIA for weeks now, or Kamala Harris, out campaigning, or anyone as far as I can tell. Suppose a space ship from another planet lands in the middle of a field in Kansas this afternoon, dispensing aliens seeking to do us harm. Who would decide what to do? 

So maybe we don't need a President after all. Think of the money we could save: Flying Air Force One costs $177,000 an hour. The annual budget for Secret Service protection of the current administration and their families was $3 billion last year. And just one state dinner at the White House runs about half a million.

All that for what? Remind me.

What's So Hateable About Trump?

Many people, mostly Democrats, seem to have forgotten that things were going swimmingly during Trump's four years as our President. In fact, the worst thing about his time in office was how much we had to see that weasel Rep. Adam Schiff of California -- a.k.a. Pencil Neck -- who famously started impeachment proceedings 15 minutes after Trump's inauguration. We also had to endure a whole lot of Nancy Pelosi's false accusations about Russian collusion, all the while her dentures --  or was it her bones? -- rattling disturbingly each time.  

Other than that, and constant harping and carping by the overpaid, bloviating talking heads on CNN and MSNBC, things were pretty damn good for most Americans. So why is he now the target of assassins, the second attempt occurring just hours ago in Florida, when all he wants to do is make things better?

What is it that people who hate Trump actually hate, and why do they hate that so much? It's a serious question, and I invite answers that do not contain the words, "orange, racist or hair."

Giggling Idiots Eating Pets

Upon careful reflection of the current political scene, I have concluded that the old saying -- no matter who said it -- that "We get the leaders we deserve," is right on the money. And here in America, no matter who we get we will have deserved him/her.

Americans are a foolish lot. They staunchly believe they rule the world despite being very low on the global rankings of our students in everything that matters, and high on the list of big, fat beef-eaters having heart attacks, strokes and cancer.

They eschew thoughtful tomes written by great philosophers of the past or present, preferring claptrap called "beach reads" pushed by the advertisers in The New York Times Book Review. They binge-watch inane TV shows and dutifully follow fads created by the evil geniuses who rake in all the dough. Examples: They paint their houses "This Year's Color" and traipse around in jeans ripped to shreds, paying extra for each hole. 

They pierce themselves in the nose and the tongue and anywhere else they can think of, making even pretty people look hideous. As for the tattoos -- OMG, don't even get me started. Is there anything worse than a really fat lady sporting a tattoo of a dainty rose on her elephantine calf?

Unthinking, uncaring, undisciplined and unoriginal sheep, they will vote for whoever they are told by the likes of the moronic ladies on "The View," who surely embody the nadir of artistic endeavors. And they don't even know what nadir means. (Relax, dear reader, I'm certainly not talking about you.)

Both presidential candidates of the moment lack the depth, strength, equanimity and intellect to lead a great nation. But America is no longer a great nation, as evidenced by the very candidates themselves: Trump wrongly repeats that immigrants are eating people's cats and dogs, while Kamala is simply a giggling idiot who promises free housing and health care for Venezuelan drug lords and free transgender surgery for prisoners. 

Out of our 337,088,081 citizens, it's inconceivable that we haven't found just two better leaders. But then, apparently we got who we deserve. 

The Ups and Downs of Home Improvement

Last Monday at 8am, a band of workmen arrived to install our home air-conditioning, or heat pump, or whatever you call it that will cool the house in summer and warm it in winter, turning my semi-reclusive artist's retreat into a chaotic construction site. And all because of global warming, which supposedly will continue to worsen, and after forking over many thousands of dollars I certainly hope it does.

But the guys -- a rotating cast of seven from Dave's World -- were so nice, they made the process of tearing up walls, drilling holes in ceilings and raining insulation dust onto everything a good time. Don't ask my cat, however, as after this week, during which Lurch got trapped in the ceiling for 28 hours, he will surely require Prozac, or maybe shock therapy, if he even lives through this -- at age 16 he is definitely on his ninth life. 

During the worst of it I reflected on the cavemen and women -- back then there were only the two genders -- who endured intense heat waves without central air, or even a window unit. Or even a window. They were a lot tougher than we are now, I'm guessing. (Except for dying young and eventually becoming extinct.)

Haitians Eating Cats

A bizarre news story has been popping up here and there online over the last few days, in part because of Republican VP candidate J.D. Vance mentioning it in a speech, about Haitian immigrants eating people's pets in Springfield, Ohio, a small town that has grown by 15,000 immigrants in the last two years. Then Donald Trump mentioned it in his debate last night with Kamala Harris.

I haven't read any of the stories because they are usually written so badly and are so biased, but I know one thing and one thing for sure: Haitians definitely do eat cats. I witnessed this alarming menu choice in person when I visited Haiti in 2013. 

I did not eat any cats but saw plenty of them laid out on hibachis and over fire pits in many Haitian backyards. However, I have no idea if the cats that were being eaten were domesticated.

Personally, to be on the safe side I stuck with rice and beans.

Kamala's Hair Won the Debate

Okay, so I watched that stupid debate which ran past my bedtime and made me oversleep this morning, making me late for a mess of things. And for what? To see that our country is in big trouble and headed for even bigger trouble? Following are my so-called "take-aways" from last night's debacle between Trump and Harris:

1. Neither candidate even came close to answering the questions put to them by the moderators -- they never do in these things -- so why do they even bother asking them? It should just be a free-for-all shouting match, possibly even a food fight involving mashed potatoes and ripe tomatoes. My favorite unanswered questions were directed at Kamala, the first from moderator David Muir: "Have you ever met Putin?" No response whatsoever, instead she went on to say how much Trump sucks for like the tenth time. And B, from Donald Trump: "If you disagree with the tariffs I placed on China and other countries, why have you not removed them in the last four years?" Again, no response, it was like she didn't even hear the question.

This woman is definitely Black.

2. Donald Trump was his worst self, getting angry and rehashing old hurts. But then who could blame him? Enough already with the tiki-torches in Charlottesville and Trump saying there were very fine people on both sides, which Kamala had the balls (I think she really does have some) to bring up AGAIN!

3. Kamala kept saying over and over, "I have a plan." Okay, okay, we heard you -- so what is your damn plan already?

4. Kamala smirked that people leave Trump's rallies early because they are "bored" and "tired." Maybe because they started to line up at six in the morning for a rally that will start at five pm -- they want to see him that much. (That's almost as early as we lined up for Beatles tickets.)

5. The moderator quoted Trump saying that Kamala "is not black, or is she?" Well, judging by her long, straight and silky hair -- which looked fantastic last night BTW, I wonder what she uses, or was it a wig? Whatever, she certainly does not have black hair, that's obvious. (See photo.) No wonder Trump is confused.

So yes, Trump blew it last night but I'm voting for him anyway because he went in cold, whereas Kamala  likely had gotten the questions beforehand from Donna Brazile, an old hand at such tactics. (Google it.) And hey -- was there an earpiece hidden in that long, flowing white-lady hair? (Barack, is that you?)

What Are Pets For?

Beginning in childhood I have lived with a changing parade of dogs, cats and parakeets, except for when I was single in my thirties. The joys of new motherhood aside, those pet-less years were the best of my life. I was free to go anywhere, anytime. Spontaneity was my middle name. Take off to Europe for a few weeks? No problem. Go away for the weekend? Sounds great! Now a retired empty-nester in my 70s, nevertheless I remain tethered -- all because of a cat. 

Specifically Lurch, our 16-year-old Maine Coon, the last in a long line of adorable, loving, fluffy and furry four-footed companions. While he is still all that, in his latter years he's become somewhat of a demanding, demented, picky pain in the ass, making me wonder why so many people, specifically me, opt for pets in the first place. 

I wondered this a lot yesterday when, in the midst of a home renovation project involving several workers drilling holes into walls and generally causing a ruckus, Lurch freaked out and ran directly into the maelstrom, falling into an opening in an attic-type space between the second and first floors of our house from which he could not exit unassisted.

Sparing the details, which are ugly, I'll say that his entrapment lasted a little over 25 hours, during which many tears were shed by yours truly. Lurch too cried mournfully for much of the time, his pitiful wails echoing through the walls. But despite my husband and I creating an exit strategy for him he stayed put, avoiding freedom and instead making our lives miserable. 

I worried he would die up there with no food or water or fresh air. But so what if he had? All the pets that came before him had died, bringing me unspeakable sadness each time. What's another dead cat anyway, I asked myself. He's just a cat, I told myself. Lots of people never have any pets, I reasoned. Thinking of all the money he's cost us in food alone -- forget pet-sitters and vet bills and that $150 for the pet psychic that time he was lost -- I put a pillow over my head and cried myself to sleep.

First thing this morning my son came to our aid and somehow, employing a combination of dexterity and determination, rescued both Lurch and my sanity. Now the cat is safely in custody under my bed, seemingly asleep but possibly suffering from PTSD from his harrowing experience. I know I am. And I'm wondering why.

Pity the Poor Children

Future Spiderman

Like most people I have many bad habits, but some of them are really bad. The worst is my penchant for reading the comments following articles I read or videos I watch online. I should just ignore them and move along, but instead I wallow in the stupidity of the masses and get depressed.

For example, I've been following the videos of a man who cooks dinner for his family every night. Despite his admirable kitchen skills, all of his recipes are unhealthy: carb-heavy with nary a vegetable or piece of fish in sight. He uses bread as a vegetable, as in one video where the main course was a meatball sandwich on a giant hero bun, served with two large garlic breadsticks on the side.  

Unlike the hateful comments that are commonplace on the internet, the glowing comments of this guy's followers are even more shocking. Everyone, and I mean everyone, applauds his dinners of beef, chicken or pork smothered in cheese and gravy and served with rice, pasta or potatoes and plenty of MSG. The viewing chorus gushes about what a wonderful dad, husband and cook he is:

"I love bread too!"

"I love seeing someone use canned chicken, it's great!"

"Looks yummy!"

"You're so creative!"

"You are perfect! Your wife is so lucky!"

"Can I move in with you?"

Obesity currently poses a serious threat to all of us, especially our children. The following is from the National Institute of Health: "Childhood and adolescent obesity have reached epidemic levels in the United States, affecting the lives of millions of people. In the past three decades, the prevalence of childhood obesity has more than doubled in children and tripled in adolescents."

I wonder what the lifespan of an American will be in 50 years. And if we keep eating like this, will there be any of us left in 50 years?

Bring Back The Friendly Skies

Tulsi Gabbard, the former Democratic congresswoman from Hawaii who left the party, has recently endorsed Donald Trump for president and openly criticizes the policies of Joe Biden and his lap dog, Kamala Harris. 

She now claims that she has been targeted as a terrorist by the TSA and has been put on their "Quiet Skies" list as a possible enemy of the state. This has resulted in Gabbard and her husband being pulled aside for questioning whenever they fly and having their bags checked, a humiliating process that takes about 45 minutes every time.

I have also endorsed Donald Trump for president and openly criticize the policies of Biden and Harris. Am I an enemy of the state? I haven't flown recently so it's hard to know if I'm on any watch lists, though I tend to doubt it since I'm a nobody and have never held any political office. But random surveillance of the citizenry at large seems to be the direction the US is heading, and a Democratic win in November should seal the deal.

Today's "Quiet Skies" are very different from the "Friendly Skies" of the 1960s. I liked those much better; at the very least you got snacks.

Every Day Is Halloween In America

I feel confident in saying that if you are reading this post you are not stupid. Okay, I'm no Einstein or Mailer or Capote or even Stephen King, and this blog is not Shakespeare, but nobody who is a complete moron would have come to it however you came to it. So let's talk about stupid people since there aren't any of them here to be offended.

First, the people who will vote for Kamala Harris for president are surely the dumbest of them all. While it's clear that many, if not most, Democrats simply want to maintain power in the White House at any cost, the fact that Harris will, if elected, be in control of our nuclear weapons, meet (alone, without a chaperone) with foreign leaders and represent America to the world is enough reason to deny her the office. Add to that the horror of seeing her ugly face and hearing her moronic cackle every day, in print and on the airwaves, is a sobering and frightening thought.

Next are the people who follow celebrities as if they matter. The ones who swoon over Taylor Swift and her boyfriend Travis Kelce. Let's remember, she's a singer and he plays football. (Quick, name the two astronauts stuck at the Space Station until next February.)

Then there are the big fat fatties who drink Coke and Pepsi for no reason since they are not thirst-quenching, think Starbucks sells coffee and not desserts, eat boxed cereals like Lucky Charms and Kix for breakfast and consider French fries a vegetable, making 43% of Americans clinically obese.

Lastly there are the true believers who keep getting the latest vaccine for Covid even though they can still get Covid anyway, which BTW is no big deal anymore but cancer is and nobody is working on a vaccine for that. (From the beginning of the Covid epidemic in 2019 to 2021, Anthony Fauci's net worth grew from $5 million to over $12.6 million. How?)

 You can hate me for saying all of the above, but that doesn't make any of it not true. Admit it: it's scary out there, and not just on Halloween.

If You've Got Money to Burn....

The other day I was out walking and a woman passed by with the most adorable dog I had ever seen. Naturally I stopped them and fawned all over the pup, peppering its owner with questions as to what breed of dog, where did she get it, how old -- that kind of thing. I was in love. (With the dog.) 

Then today, at the supermarket of all places, another woman had a similar dog, equally adorable. She and I talked and it turned out that both dogs were Bernedoodles from the same breeder in Salt Lake City.

I had to have one of those dogs! 

My husband and I have gone back and forth on the issue since our last dog died many years ago: It's too heartbreaking. But they are so much fun! It's sad when they get sick. But they are so loving! They make it hard to travel. They fill the house with life! Etc., etc., etc. I really, really wanted one. 

I tried to talk myself out of it, but this dog was so special that I went forward with the fantasy and took the first step. I checked out the breeder and saw pictures of the puppies currently available. There were so many! And all of them so cute! How to choose? Then I saw the prices: $5,000 for this one. $4,500 for that one. $3,800 for another. A bargain at $3,000. (What's wrong with him?) End of fantasy. 

I pity all the rich people who don't know what the heck to do with their money.

Kamala Harris Did It

Apparently I killed four people yesterday and I didn't even know it until I read it in the paper this morning! The shooting in a Georgia high school by a 14-year-old student is being blamed by every Democrat with access to the internet on all Republicans, because of their "love of guns."

I am a Republican. I have never owned a gun, held a gun, or even been in the same room with a gun. My parents did not own guns, although to be fair they were both lifelong Democrats so that must explain it. 

To be clear: I hate violence, I am a pacifist and I am pretty sure I did not even leave my house yesterday. So please don't blame me for some crazy kid's crazy behavior. In fact, if you have to blame anyone besides the person who pulled the trigger, blame Kamala Harris. After all, as our current vice-president she oversees the White House Office of Gun Violence Prevention, and has done absolutely nothing to stop it. What good is she?

Addiction Comes in All Shapes and Sizes

"Studies have shown that doing jigsaw puzzles can improve cognition and visual-spatial reasoning. Using the puzzle as an exercise of the mind can spark imagination and increase both your creativity and productivity."

I found the preceding quote on a medical website touting the benefits of doing jigsaw puzzles as a way to stave off dementia and even increase your lifespan. As someone who has been deep into jigsaw puzzles since the start of the Covid epidemic in 2020, I say "poppycock." In fact I would go so far as to say the opposite is true: doing a jigsaw puzzle requires no imagination or creativity whatsoever, only good eyesight. And it certainly lessens your productivity.

For example, beds go unmade, dishes go undone and home renovation projects lay dormant once you've got a new puzzle going. Also, if you start one shortly before bedtime, promising you'll find "just one more piece," you can count on losing valuable hours of sleep since it's almost impossible to stop once you get going. And any doctor will tell you, sleep is much more vital to an increased lifespan than jigsaw puzzles.

Speaking from experience, you know you've got a problem when you dream about doing jigsaw puzzles. To be safe, if you don't do them don't start, and if you're already hooked, try to cut back. And for God's sake, don't let your kids get near one.

.

Who Says I'm A Mess?

On a recent walk in our little town of Freeport, I was stunned to see a brand new, pretty big -- dare I say huge -- sign posted in the parking lot of the CVS pharmacy hawking vaccines for Covid and the flu. For free, and no appointments necessary. Walk-ins welcome, just come on down!

WTF? According to the CDC, the latest Covid vaccine  offers protection for "a couple of months." Then what? Should we get another one? And then another? Who is benefitting, and who made that sign?

Everywhere you look there are reminders that we are simply not good enough without some help. Unseen forces push products aimed at fixing our bodies and our minds. One popular example is the drug Prevagen. What started as an FDA-approved aid for people diagnosed with early-onset Alzheimer's and experiencing memory loss is now targeted at any and all "cognitively normal" adults who want a "sharper mind" and "clearer thinking." And really, who among us doesn't want that? Sounds good to me!

BTW, you have to take Prevagen for three months before you realize improvements in cognitive function ..... maybe. A report by Forbes states, "There are no peer-reviewed, independent, clinical studies available to support the health claims made directly by the makers of Prevagen regarding the product’s efficacy. "

Even if your parents told you that you were perfect in every way, that you were made in God's image, and that they wouldn't change a thing about you, as an adult the overriding message we all receive is that we need a drug, or a hearing aid, or a muscle relaxer, or a laxative, or a sleep aid, or a probiotic, or a vitamin supplement just to make it through the day. And that's if we are healthy.

I like what my parents told me better.

Beware of Siri, et al.

More than a vacuum cleaner?

If you are one of those trusting people who believe that Siri and Alexa and that vacuum cleaner rolling around the premises picking up dust bunnies are making your life easier, all I can say is, "Oh grow up!" I would also suggest you read Orwell's 1984 if you haven't yet.

Last night I dined with a group of friends. The six of us all had cell phones within earshot. We talked about possibly taking a Viking cruise along the Danube River. This morning my Facebook stream is full of ads for Viking cruises along the Danube River.

This is nothing new. I often get ads on Facebook for handbags -- having bought a few of them online it's easy to see how that happens, capitalism being what it is. But I have never been on a cruise, Viking or otherwise, and yet somehow my phone "heard" me talking about it last night. I would say this qualifies as alarming.

One can only imagine who or what is listening to everything you say when you have one of those helpful home assistants hanging around. My advice is to trash the thing and get up and do whatever it is that needs doing by yourself. And for God's sake, get rid of that MAGA hat before they come for you.

Celebrating the End of Summer

Amid all the Trump hate and Kamala love in today's New York Times, an article entitled "How Should We Mourn the End of Summer?" caught my eye. The author moans, "The season's conclusion can spark a sense of loss" because "the plans and possibilities of summer cease." She/he grieves the kayaks and beach chairs being stored for the winter and those speculative camping trips that never happened. All I can say about that is "Boo-fucking-hoo."

Where I live in Maine, summer pretty much sucks. A common misconception is that it's always colder up here, but our summer is often as brutal as anywhere, except of course in Florida, Phoenix and Hades. 

Not only does it get very, very hot and very, very humid on many, if not most days from June through September, sometimes into October, but we have bugs like nobody's business. Green flies that bite. Black flies that bite. Mosquitoes, of course that bite. And most especially, our very own Browntail moths, which are found nowhere else but in Africa and New England and which make you want to tear your skin off. Here's a bit of info about them from the CDC website:

The browntail moth is an invasive species found only in Maine and Cape Cod. This moth is an insect of both forest and human health concern. 

The browntail moth caterpillar has tiny poisonous hairs that cause dermatitis similar to poison ivy on sensitive individuals. Most people affected by the hairs develop a localized rash that will last for a few hours up to several days but on sensitive individuals the rash can be severe and last for several weeks, or longer. 

The rash results from both a chemical reaction to a toxin in the hairs and a physical irritation as the barbed hairs become embedded in the skin. 

Respiratory distress from inhaling the hairs can be serious. Caterpillars are active from April to late June. Hairs remain toxic throughout the summer but get washed into the soil and are blah, blah, blah ....

As one of those "sensitive individuals" I celebrate the end of summer, which by the way will not come for another three weeks. So all you sad sacks take heart: There's still plenty of time left to contract Eastern Equine Encephalitis (EEE), the latest designer mosquito bite that can kill, or maybe get sun poisoning or lose a limb to a shark or succumb to dehydration or drown in your overturned kayak. 

As my father would say, it could happen.