Many years ago, a close old friend of mine from college days declared he could no longer participate in our relationship because I had voted for George W. Bush.
"That's it," he said on the phone, and hung up. And just like that our years-long friendship was over! It took me a while to realize that the real reason was something else entirely: I was the only person who knew about his two-year extra-marital affair (with another friend of mine) and he constantly feared I would tell his wife, so he needed me out of the picture. You see, it wasn't about politics at all.
It never is. Almost every one of my closest friends is a Democrat -- all but one, in fact -- and despite my criticizing liberals in my blog and voting for what they consider the "wrong candidate" in every election, our friendships continue to thrive. Until about a month ago, when a so-called neighborhood friend stormed into my home to scold and berate me about my political beliefs and most of all, my "crude" blog. We have not spoken since.
Her surprise attack was both shocking and sad, especially since her husband (who I like a lot and miss seeing) shares my beliefs. But he wisely, or foolishly, keeps his mouth shut around her "to keep the peace," which is how she likes it.
After weeks of contemplation I realized there's no fixing things since the real reason for her Pearl Harbor-like condemnation of everything about me is that she never liked me anyway. I know, because I never really liked her either; the friendship was all about our liking for her husband, and she was part of the package.
The bottom line is that true friendship will not end over politics. If you find that happening in your life, look deeper. What you'll likely find is that there was never any mutual respect or common ground on which to base a friendship to begin with. Living in the same neighborhood rarely means anything more than living in the same neighborhood.
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