Gender, Shmender

The young actress formerly known as Ellen Page recently announced his/her new name as Elliott Page on Twitter, where else. His/her new pronouns are he/his. Formerly gay, she/he is now transgender. This means she's a man now. For this she/he is being lauded and applauded by all of Hollywood for bravery, honesty and hipness. Publicly tweeting congratulations to Elliott signals to the world that you also stand for all that is good and pure and honest and true, and that you embrace equality of all peoples, and that you hope to expand your fan base to include all LGBTQs.

I/me don't get it. We try to get it, really, but it escapes us. So many questions: If you still get your period, do you feel manly? Or do those hormones make it stop? And is having a beard the key to being a man or is having a penis the key to being a man? Does losing your breasts make you feel at peace with yourself? If so, I want mine gone ASAP. And if gender is no big deal why couldn't she/he keep the name Ellen? I know a woman named Timothy who is very feminine and nobody raises an eyebrow.

Man, woman -- who gives a shit? The world is in chaos. There is a global pandemic which, as my cousin Brian pointed out, is widespread. Many thousands have died and many more are sick in hospitals. The economy is tanked. People are jobless, rendered homeless because they can't pay their rent. And while Elliott may be happier with his/her new gender identity, I hardly see how/why congratulations are in order. Move along people, there's nothing to see here.