Baby Boomers Still Rule. (Not Sorry)

A face only a mother could love?

This morning, as I ate my healthy breakfast of a banana, some blueberries and a bowl of oatmeal with a tablespoon of peanut butter on the side, I scrolled through an article online about the terrible foods that Baby Boomers, who are the worst of the worst according to the author and should just die off already, still eat. On the list is plain white toast, mayonnaise, "a nasty food smothered on anything," and meat loaf. "Meat loaf looks disgusting and tastes even worse," declared the article's author. He, or maybe They, went on, citing proudly that, "We millennials squeeze our own almond milk!"

In response I would like to say that I find most millennials disgusting to look at. Their snot-like nose rings, pointless lip and tongue balls, pierced eyebrows, giant earlobe holes filled with a black tar plug, purple, green and magenta lifeless spiky hair, hideous tattoos covering most of their arms and legs, and sometimes a neck, oversized jeans with huge torn holes up and down the legs, and general sloppy attire, combat boots and fingernails painted black as if the whole hand had been smashed in a car door, make all of them look like extras from the set of The Night of the Living Dead. (Not my son however, who has eschewed the questionable fashion trends of his generation and thus is still as beautiful as the day he was born. But the rest of them: feh!)

So I will keep eating my delicious meatloaf, and of course toast, which I might even try with a dab of mayo. In fact, a meatloaf on toast with mayo sandwich sounds pretty, pretty, pretty good right now. As for squeezing almonds into milk, when you don't work and have plenty of time on your hands, that might be something to do.