As Indian as A Jeep Cherokee

While I personally have never used the term, many folks around these parts refer to our southern neighbors as "Massholes." I heard the word on my very first day as a Maine resident and was told it was because they are bad drivers. This turned out to be true, what with their penchant for tailgating and never giving an inch when you're trying to merge onto the highway, but still I thought the derogatory moniker was undeserved; why not just call them bad drivers? However, I now feel differently and it's all because of Senator Elizabeth Warren who is clearly a Masshole, and that's spelled with a capital A.

As everyone knows, the poor, possibly demented, Warren is being mocked for her recent disclosure of a DNA test showing she is one-millionth of a percent Native American, or some such meaningless amount. My concern is that she ever dreamed up such a thing in the first place. Wasn't she good enough to be hired as a professor at Harvard Law without minority status? I've heard her mumble something about having high cheek bones and family lore, blah, blah, blah. But really, that's insane, not to mention rude and disrespectful to every true Native American, especially the Cherokee tribe to which she lays claim.

It's all a crock, and yet she's up for re-election in Massachusetts and remains the front runner of the Democratic Party in 2020's presidential election. That's crazy talk! The party leaders should put their headdresses together and come up with somebody quick or else it's Trump for another four years. More crazy talk.