A One-Size-Fits-All New Year's Resolution

This being the last day of the year, I feel a need to comment on it. But really, what can be said? It's  just another Sunday, and tomorrow, God willing, will be just another Monday. Yet over the last week I have seen at least six articles in newspapers and on the Internet titled "How to Keep Your New Year's Resolutions." I say I have seen them because I haven't actually read them, just skimmed over the pages through squinted eyes, trying to protect myself from ingesting the same advice over and over.

First of all, who are these writers and what do they know? Are they behavioral psychologists, or did they at least interview any? Most are ordinary staff writers armed with everyday knowledge of everyday things, so just move along to the crossword puzzle which will at least keep your brain sharp a few more months.

Whatever your resolution, keep this in mind: You could die at any moment. You could be fine one minute and feel slightly nauseous the next. Before you know it you're inside an ambulance speeding to an operating room where they will slice you open and look inside. And what they see in there will decide your future, if you have one.

So get it together today. In fact, forget making resolutions, just live the life you wish you could live, while you can. Don't eat glazed donuts and salty bagels and pancakes with gooey syrup and fatty bacon for breakfast; they'll just gum up your insides which are even more important than your outsides, and once your internal organs go, you go. And forget willpower. Stop smoking because you love yourself and nicotine poisons every cell in your body, the very one you hang around in and take to all your experiences. Without it you are literally nothing. Here's the only resolution anyone needs: Face the truth and act on it.