It's All a Crock

Pity me. I am such a cynic. I never believe anything. I always think things are set-ups, rigged, fake, phoney and bullshit. It's a drag, I tell you, but seemingly beyond my control. Take for example a video I just saw online wherein the actor Michael Douglas supposedly "surprises" his 98-year-old dad, Kirk Douglas, by sneaking up behind him on a TV talk show. What fun!

First of all, who in their right mind would sneak up behind a 98-year-old? That is asking for trouble even with a healthy person that age, but when the 98-year-old in question suffered a severe stroke years ago and looks not quite as good as death warmed over, it's foolhardy at best. So here comes Michael, walking on his tippy-toes in the background, and the interviewer asks Kirk, "How is your son Michael?" And Kirk answers, "I never know where he is. I never know where he'll turn up."

Oh please. What kind of an answer is that? She did not ask where is Michael, she asked how is Michael. Then the interviewer says, "Look behind you," and Kirk does and laughs and says, "Oh where did you come from?" But he's not surprised in the least, which explains why he did not keel over, dead.

I suppose the good news is that Kirk can still follow a script.