Moving Along

I am not an expert on much, but this much I can say for sure: If you lay around doing nothing but eat and sleep, you will put on weight.This unfortunate chicken has come home to roost since I cracked a couple of ribs last Sunday night, and I don't mean the barbecue kind. Laid up since then, four new pounds have shown up. This dire situation has come about by following my doctor's orders: In order for my ribs to heal, I was instructed to move around as little as possible. As a result, the most rigorous exercise I've gotten all week is deep weeping, with the occasional sneeze or cough thrown in to the mix. 

Buy that's it-- I'm done. I don't want to be fat because as we all know, being fat is bad. This is not just my opinion: People get surgery for it, and have their stomachs stapled, cut in half or removed entirely for all I know. Some choose to have their jaws wired shut so they can't insert food into their mouths. Hoping to avoid those extreme measures, my period of recuperation is officially ending right now. Now-- where are my shoes?