All the News Unfit to Print

Ah -- The New York Times, that esteemed newspaper of the intelligentsia we are all supposed to revere. In today's magazine section there is an example (shown above) of how some paid staff members spend their time when they aren't out in search of anti-Trump trivia. The research-and-analytics department of the Times annoyed 2,250 subscribers with the following question: Which would you rather have happen to you? 
A. A paper cut
B. Stub a toe
C. Make a minor mistake at work
D. Bad haircut

At least we can take heart that of those asked, 22 self-respecting adults refused to participate. They must have been Republicans.