News Nobody Needs But Gets Anyway

As a student of popular culture I am always interested to see just how low that simmering, cesspool of meaningless information commonly known as "the Internet" can sink. And guess what? This morning I found out! The following headline appears on a website that purports to keep its readers informed of important trends and breaking news: "Kelly Ripa Reveals Her Daughter Secretly Had Her Prom Dress Neckline Lowered."

After reading that I didn't know what to do. Life seemed different somehow.