Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Truth or Dare

It was painful, but worth it.
Aging is America's plague, one to be dodged like a bullet. But try as you might, it gets you in the end. Still, most people spend their later years pretending they just came in the morning mail. Why is this? What is so terrible about being old? Why is our age something we should hide? Why are there so many products promising to make us look younger? If we look younger, will be actually be younger? Will we live longer? Will we not die ever? These questions popped into mind after reading an article in today's Wall Street Journal suggesting that you can "appear younger at work" by lying about how old your children are.

But why stop there? Why not just lie about everything, like all our politicians do? What is so important about the truth? Does it matter if you tell it? Who cares anymore? As Hillary Clinton said concerning the death of four Americans in Benghazi during her tenure as Secretary of State, "What difference, at this point, does it make?" Then she got a concussion and now she's running for president, and lots of people are planning to vote for her! Certainly what I have to say about anything at all matters even less. For example, some of the following statements are true; I dare you to tell which ones:

I was born in a circus tent. 
I weigh 126 pounds.
My paternal grandparents were Russian aristocrats. 
I have a tattoo of Freddie Mercury on my back.
My mother was a Rockette. 
I know all the lyrics to every Beatles song.
I smoked for 40 years.
I used to be a Democrat.
As a young child I appeared in TV commercials.
I went to Harvard University but dropped out.
I am 62 years old.
I was kidnapped by a gypsy woman when I was four.
I dated John Travolta. 
I read "Ulysses" twice and hated it both times. 
My son is 27 and a genius. 
I had surgery for lung cancer but never had the disease.
I've never read "Ulysses."

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