Tuesday, October 15, 2019

Sweetening the Democratic Pot



The Democratic presidential hopefuls are ratcheting up their promises, and it's working. Businessman Andrew Yang is resonating with younger voters and has pulled ahead in recent polls after announcing his plan to give every American $1,000 a month to vote for him. (He doesn't come right out and say that, but that's what he means.) And Bernie Sanders has promised free health care and free college tuition if you vote for him, while Elizabeth Warren echoes that, plus will pay off your student loan and throw in an Indian headdress if you vote for her.

The problem is they're all so cookie-cutter. What I'm waiting for is someone who stands out from the crowd, someone who addresses the issues of special interest groups. What about free boxes of Depends for women of a certain age? How about unlimited Botox injections for anyone over 60? Or home-delivered (in a brown wrapper) Viagra for men with flagging libidos? Free dildos, condoms, wigs and duct tape for the LGBT crowd?  Now that would be a candidate I could get behind.

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