What's Wrong with Amy Schumer?

Sad but true, there are people walking among us suffering from severe personality disorders. Whether those disorders stem from a traumatic childhood, missing or defective genes, drug or alcohol addiction or something else, they have gone haywire and ended up with no idea of how to behave. We call these people "celebrities" and are fascinated by them, like the freaks in a side show at circuses long ago.

One of the most offensive is a woman named Amy Schumer. She became famous by talking non-stop about the condition of and visitors to her own "pussy" and "cunt" as the basis of her stand-up comedy act. Her foul mouth endeared her to the huddled masses, who envied her ability to let it all hang out and be shocking. Fittingly, she got indecently rich off her indecent behavior, while my dear friend Teresa, a nurse practitioner (who's a lot better-looking than Ms. Schumer) working daily 12-hour shifts in a hospital helping to heal the sick earns a tolerable income, but not a particularly comfortable one.

Now Ms. Schumer is pregnant and is compelled by her neurosis to post the above picture of herself online, as if we all want to see it, need to see it, or should. Has she no modesty? What's wrong with her? Even more, I worry about the editorial decision made by several popular magazines that have published this very photo, as if it's actually newsworthy. I can't help but wonder: what got us here?