Kudzu for President

I am not sure why kudzu gets so little press coverage. The Japanese vine has all but taken over America's southwest and is slowly moving north. The photo at right shows a house in Georgia covered with the stuff; hopefully the occupants got out of there alive.

Introduced to America in 1876 and embraced by the public as a lovely ornamental addition to home gardens, kudzu was then widely used by our government as an antidote to soil erosion during the 1930s. But it grew so fast--12 inches a day by some accounts-- that by 1972, the USDA declared it a weed. Despite its potential as an alternate source of paper, thus saving forests for future generations, it is now seen as a menace beyond control.

Love it or hate it, all agree kudzu is powerful and unstoppable. Last seen approaching the suburbs of Virginia and Maryland, it's heading straight for our nation's capital. Just imagine it covering the White House, climbing the steps to the Supreme Court and filling the halls of Congress, finally silencing Nancy Pelosi's big, fat botoxed mouth; it's fun to do. Anyway, partisan politics aside, a kudzu coup in DC would certainly stop all the bickering and give those warring politicians a common enemy to attack instead of each other. It's got my vote.