Skip to main content

Georgia On My Mind

Early this morning while you were still sleeping, the state of Georgia executed the only woman on its Death Row. They did it by lethal injection, the same way you might put down a sick animal. Only she wasn't a sick animal, she was the 47-year-old mother of three children who desperately wanted her to remain alive, even though her crime was convincing someone else to murder their father 18 years ago. The "someone else" was her lover at the time, and he willingly did the deed, driving the cuckolded spouse to a remote area and stabbing him multiple times. But get this: that guy got life in prison with the possibility of parole in 25 years, but for planning the crime, the wife lost her life.

Scary stuff, all of it. It seemed unlikely that the woman was a threat to the general population (or even the prison population) as she, like many others who are incarcerated for many years, found God and turned into a downright angel. Even the Pope, on his whirlwind American tour last week, asked for mercy in her case. You'd think he'd have some pull, but no dice, they went ahead and did it anyway.

There are several lessons here: First, if you hate your husband, just get a divorce. Second, if you're dating someone who asks you to kill their spouse, end the relationship immediately. And finally, if you live in Georgia, be careful what you wish for.


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

Be Nice to Your Insides

Desiring nothing as much as to avoid sinking into the quicksand of Trump's meeting with Kim, I will instead write about a subject that few people ever talk about: our fabulous internal organs. They go about their business with little appreciation and hardly any mention at all, until they stop working right. Then we hear that this one had a heart attack, that one's got pancreatic cancer, and the other one had his gall bladder removed. Meanwhile, that poor drunk slumped over the bar has cirrhosis of the liver. But really, can any of us say what each of those organs do when they are in good working order? I certainly couldn't. Not until recently, when I spent a good part of the weekend reading a book called The Fast Metabolism Diet, which I then embarked on and committed to following for the next 28 days.

It all started when I met a friend for lunch last week. I hadn't seen her in a couple of months, and the last time we met she was looking haggard and grey, and a bit pu…

Modern Family

My husband travels a lot for business. Always has. When we were first married, I would on occasion call the hotel where he would be staying and pretend I was from the mayor's office of whatever city and alert them to a visiting dignitary, asking them to put wine and mints and maybe flowers in his room. I always knew exactly where he was, on what particular flight, and would track his progress. He always called when he landed to allay my fears, since back then I assumed that any and every plane would crash.

Now we have been married for 28 years. Today he went somewhere--your guess is as good as mine but I think it's Chicago or Philadelphia-- and I know he didn't crash because there's been nothing on the news. Besides, according to my Chat list he was online just four minutes ago. Ahh, marriage! Or rather, ahh Facebook!

What Hath God Wrought?

In a shocking turn of events, a group of angry Malaysians demonstrated outside of God's pearly-gated community yesterday. Demanding He "tell the truth" and promising no retaliation, relatives of the passengers on the missing airline MH370 swore, in several languages, that there were "no strings attached." Neither God nor any of his disciples were available for comment, and thus far calls to His office have not been returned as the whole lot of them are out seeing "Noah."