Somebody's Pies For Sale

As a pretty decent baker myself, I almost never buy a pie made by a stranger. I've sampled enough of them to know they are not worth the money or the calories, most of which come from corn starch which is how come they are so goopy. Exceptions have of course occurred, like a last-minute invite to a potluck party or shiva visit, or if I just don't like the recipient but can't go empty-handed. 

But there's a church in our little town that I pass by every day, and on Thursdays they put up a sign outside the front entrance: "Pies: Dinner and Dessert, 3-6 pm." I've been seeing this sign every Thursday for the last six or eight years, but have not gone in to investigate. Today I did. After all, if you don't do something unexpected every so often, what the heck is life for? 

Inside I found four elderly people, three men and a woman, the men in fleece vests, obviously devoted LLBean shoppers, and the woman in a drab raincoat, no label, sitting on bridge chairs having a grand old time chatting. Next to them was a poster-sized menu of their offerings, stating "100% of all net pie revenue goes to local missions." I did have to look up the meaning of "missions" and learned that it has to do with evangelism or helping people in the name of the Christian faith, so it's all good.

I inquired as to who makes the pies, and you'd think I had asked them to name all 50 state capitals. None of them knew, and all were perplexed by the question. Why did I want to know? I explained that I did not want to die of food poisoning without my family knowing who to sue. I was joking, but really, who would eat stranger food without having someone to blame later? Finding out was like pulling teeth, only harder. Finally one of them pieced together a story that led to a website that might lead to an answer. 

Anyway, the pies all cost $30.00 and are quite large. My husband and I are just two people wanting to get smaller. I left there and went across the street to a fancy market that sells smaller chicken pot pies for $16.99, with the name of the bakery right on the box, and bought one of those. Once back home, I googled until my fingers hurt but never found any website of any such pie-producer with the name I had been given.