Tuesday, November 23, 2021

The Antidote to Wokeness

I barely left my home today. It's so much easier, and certainly the only way to avoid offending someone. Here in Maine, just driving around my neighborhood I am trespassing on the sacred lands of the Wabanaki, and that can't be good. Although according to my son, the tribe ceded the land to the city of Portland so it's not stolen property. Besides, how else can I get around? I never learned to hover.

I did go to the post office to mail some bills. I just ran in without a face mask for a few seconds and then ran out, but not soon enough to avoid the steely glare and harsh words from a masked woman entering, who chided, "Masks are RECOMMENDED in here, didn't you see the sign?" I didn't bother telling her that the postmistress herself told me masks are now optional. Besides, don't two vaccinations and a booster count for anything?

The news is off limits because it's so bad these days and promises to get worse. I turned on the TV for two minutes to see if any active shooters were holding hostages or airplanes had struck any buildings or terrorists had taken over our government, and managed to catch sight of a pasty-faced Joe Biden stumbling through a teleprompter reading, saying, "Today all Americans have more money in their pockets than they had before the pandemic." Crazy talk from a nutty guy we call "Mr. President."

So by nightfall I'm ready for some laughs. Lately I've been watching random episodes of Seinfeld and Curb Your Enthusiasm which are now streaming on Netflix and HBOMax. It's so refreshing -- the shows mock everybody equally and it's perfectly okay. Wildly funny too. I go to sleep with a smile on my face, resting up to do battle with the Army of Wokeness the next day.

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