Weaklings Don't Always Weigh 90 Pounds

I went to a new exercise class this morning that did what those things usually do: Make me feel like I am completely out of shape and have about half an hour left to live. The other class members were doing great, since of course they all know the drill. But I alone was the newbie who seemed to be out of it the whole time. Partly this was because much of the exercising took place perched atop a giant inflated rubber ball. And when we weren't sitting on the rubber ball, which had a tendency to roll around as most balls do, we were standing on half of another rubber ball that was, if anything, even harder to master.

You would think the class would be called "Getting Ballsy" or "The Art of Exercising on Inappropriate Surfaces," but it was not. Instead, it was called "Integrative Strength." It was good that I went, since I found out for sure that I have none. The teacher, a gem who I liked instantly for her friendly candor, told me right off the bat, after watching me for awhile, that I have "good, strong shoulders" and "no back muscles." As nicely as possible, she alluded to the fact that my core also sucks. (It's a wonder I can hold up those shoulders.) I'm going back Monday. After all, my trip to Haiti is a month away and I have to get in fighting shape, just in case.