The Truth About Aging

I've been seeing quite a few interviews with random older people on Instagram where they are asked how they feel about getting older, or what's the worst thing about being older, or the best? Their answers are mostly total BS, given a positive spin because they are on camera. Here's the real lowdown from someone who turned 77 two months ago.

First of all, to contradict much of what some people have said, being old is not the best time of your life. Not at all. No, being in kindergarten is the best time of your life. Beyond that, being younger rather than older is better in many ways. Like how your body feels. 

Despite exercising and working out twice a week with a Crossfit trainer, I find waking up each morning a daily surprise --- not that I woke up but how stiff my body feels. It must happen while I'm sleeping, because when I get into my super-comfy bed the night before I feel fine, but next morning I feel like a burlap sack filled with rocks. It takes a good ten minutes and a strong cup of black coffee to get things working right.

Even if you are relatively healthy and can run around like Mick Jagger still does at 80, problems arise just from having used the equipment for so long. I could list from A to Z the petty annoyances that show up out of the blue, requiring Googling of symptoms and repeated trips to the CVS. Nothing terminal, thank God, but enough to make me weep occasionally and grab a marijuana pipe for a few calming puffs. Of course there are also heart attacks, but that goes without saying. (I had one six years ago and don't speak of it.)

Also, your friends start dying. This will continue until they are all dead, or you are.

So there you have it: the plain truth about aging. And don't get me started on your teeth and gums -- that's a whole other story altogether.