Woke Up, Maine!

The snooty Falmouth Marina, at dusk.

Apparently no place is safe from the Woke Police. Here in Maine, America's northeasternmost state with a population of 1,354,520, we're a bit out of the loop. It takes a while for us to catch up, and so we don't have much to gripe about. No statues of racists, no confederate flags, and our baseball team is named the Sea Dogs so unless some dogs are insulted, it's staying. But finally some people have figured out that we have a team worth renaming, and they're pretty worked up about it.

Falmouth High school is located in the town of Falmouth, Maine, a rich, upper-crust community with houses to die for. Like the rest of the state, the residents are overwhelmingly white. Several of the school's teams -- basketball, hockey and track -- share the name "Yachtsmen." Originating in 1948 with a mascot named "Yachti" -- an odd looking creature in sailor's garb -- suddenly it's all got to go.

The only player of color on an all-white team complained that the team name "does not make me feel included." Her criticism is that Yachtsmen represents "white men and the wealthy sport of yachting," and this is bad because everyone knows that white people suck and I guess yachting does too. Another student, quoted in the local paper The Northern Forecaster, said "People of different sex origins don't feel included. The Yachtsman is a rich white man with a yacht. It makes Falmouth sound snooty." School officials are busy trying to come up with a new name, while I personally am wondering what exactly "sex origins" are and what name might make them feel included.

A few facts: Falmouth High School has 842 students, with a minority enrollment of 160 students, or 19%. The town of Falmouth is home to three golf courses, the Portland Yacht Club and 157 registered boat owners out of 12,496 residents. The average home price is $625,000. The cost of living in Falmouth is 33% above the national average. The racial composition of the town is 96.52% white, 2.86% Asian, 0% African American, 0% Native American, 0% other races and .62% biracial.