The Racist Creed of the Democrats Circa 2021

Republican South Carolina Senator Tim Scott

If you dare to say that all black people look alike, you risk being ridden out of town on a rail, or pilloried in the streets, and most certainly cancelled by Twitter and Facebook and YouTube for your obviously racist beliefs. Yet it's perfectly acceptable to say the following in 2021:

1. All black people are either too dumb or too inept to procure a voter I.D. card, according to the leaders of the Democratic Party. They also can't figure out how to vote in person, and if they do and must stand in line for a long time, they never think to bring snacks or water so, like dogs, they must be given those things.

2. All black people think alike, according to president Joe Biden, who famously said, ''If you vote for Trump, you ain't black.'' 

3. All black people carry hot sauce with them at all times, according to Hillary Clinton.

4. Most black people need handouts of food, health care, housing and education from the government in order to live.

5. Black students are less intelligent than whites and Asians and so must be allowed into college without test scores or other measures of their competence.

6. All black conservatives, NO MATTER HOW INTELLIGENT, NO MATTER WHAT LEVEL OF SUCCESS THEY HAVE ACHIEVED, NO MATTER WHAT OFFICE THEY HOLD, are considered to be Uncle Toms working in service to The Massa. But not Whoopie Goldberg, who as a black mascot, complete with phony dreadlocks, has kowtowed to white TV producers for years.

President Grampa Stays Up Late

Ted Cruz giving Biden his full attention.

In case you missed Biden's speech to Congress last night (perhaps you were busy cleaning the toilets or changing the cat litter or hand washing your underwear -- all things of greater import), I, with nothing else to do and with a husband who insists on keeping up with such things in order to do battle on Facebook the next day, sat through it and will give you the highlights, although full disclosure commands me to admit to playing Words With Friends the whole time and so I only heard it, looking up rarely but luckily in time to see Ted Cruz napping (see photo).

1. Despite the fact that all the people in the room had been vaccinated long ago, and only half the usual suspects were in evidence and spread out a la social distancing, all present wore masks. (What dummies! Haven't they heard the latests CDC guidelines?) No handshaking allowed, instead fist bumps were everywhere so I guess your knuckles can't get Covid.

2. In a display of bravado, Biden took his mask off to give the speech. He looks better with it on.

3. He mentioned the approaching anniversary of the death of George Floyd, a lifelong criminal who became a national hero because he was killed by a cop. Hope this isn't going to become a national holiday!

4. The only reference Biden made to the growing race war in America was his avowal to get rid of all the white supremacists. No telling how, but if you are white I'd lay low.

5. Kamala Harris and Nancy Pelosi were called out by Biden for being females in such high office. As proof of their equality, both wore pants to the auspicious occasion. Veep Harris could be seen cackling, as usual, behind her mask several times. I wonder, does she listen to comedy podcasts through tiny earbuds all day long?

6. First Lady Jill Biden, with nothing to prove, wore a dress. Actually it was quite pretty.

7. Maxine Waters was there and is, deplorably, still alive. Happily there was no sign of AOC, or the one with the turban, or the other one with the big mouth.

8. Joe said everything will be free for everyone and the rich people will pay for all of it.

Woke Up, Maine!

The snooty Falmouth Marina, at dusk.

Apparently no place is safe from the Woke Police. Here in Maine, America's northeasternmost state with a population of 1,354,520, we're a bit out of the loop. It takes a while for us to catch up, and so we don't have much to gripe about. No statues of racists, no confederate flags, and our baseball team is named the Sea Dogs so unless some dogs are insulted, it's staying. But finally some people have figured out that we have a team worth renaming, and they're pretty worked up about it.

Falmouth High school is located in the town of Falmouth, Maine, a rich, upper-crust community with houses to die for. Like the rest of the state, the residents are overwhelmingly white. Several of the school's teams -- basketball, hockey and track -- share the name "Yachtsmen." Originating in 1948 with a mascot named "Yachti" -- an odd looking creature in sailor's garb -- suddenly it's all got to go.

The only player of color on an all-white team complained that the team name "does not make me feel included." Her criticism is that Yachtsmen represents "white men and the wealthy sport of yachting," and this is bad because everyone knows that white people suck and I guess yachting does too. Another student, quoted in the local paper The Northern Forecaster, said "People of different sex origins don't feel included. The Yachtsman is a rich white man with a yacht. It makes Falmouth sound snooty." School officials are busy trying to come up with a new name, while I personally am wondering what exactly "sex origins" are and what name might make them feel included.

A few facts: Falmouth High School has 842 students, with a minority enrollment of 160 students, or 19%. The town of Falmouth is home to three golf courses, the Portland Yacht Club and 157 registered boat owners out of 12,496 residents. The average home price is $625,000. The cost of living in Falmouth is 33% above the national average. The racial composition of the town is 96.52% white, 2.86% Asian, 0% African American, 0% Native American, 0% other races and .62% biracial. 

The Oscars Are So Over

Last night I finally achieved true adulthood: I did not watch the Academy Awards. Not out of spite or churlishness or the desire to be "a rebel, but simply because I forgot it was on TV and when I remembered I was deep into an episode of "SVU," and also who gives a crap. However this morning it was splashed all over the news on the Internet, so I found out the following important things:

1. Before the ceremony, loser Glenn Close rubbed CBD oil onto her feet.  (Actually she had someone else rub it on her feet for her.) She later wowed the crowd by doing a dance called "Da Butt," which as you may imagine consists of sticking out your butt and moving it from side to side. (One wonders if she also rubbed CBD oil on her butt.)

2. Although plenty of "people of color" won awards in many categories, nevertheless the woke generation loudly complained because some "old white people" actually managed to win the top acting honors. One of them was Frances McDormand for her humorless portrayal of a depressed homeless person in Nomadland, a boring movie about depressed homeless people that won Best Picture. Skip it and watch My Octopus Teacher instead, a Netflix entry that deservedly won Best Documentary.

3. Anthony Hopkins, another one of those old whites who won the award for Best Actor, did not show up to receive it and his statuette was accepted instead by a photograph of him. Bravo, Anthony!

Giving Blacks a Green Light

Just how far are we willing to go, as a society, to appease black people? Those Black Lives Matter signs are getting pretty stale by now; surely we can do more.

New York State Attorney General Letitia James, who as Public Advocate for the City of New York was the first woman of color to hold citywide office, is calling for NYC police to cease routine traffic stops since these often allow cops to learn that the driver with a lapsed registration or missing taillight also has a warrant out for far more serious offenses, and a confrontation could lead to death for either the cop or the criminal.

Months ago the city of San Francisco decriminalized shoplifting. Owners of retail establishments there have been instructed not to call the police or even try to detain the thieves when they see someone stealing.

Oakland, California police were ordered to stop their traffic involvement in minority neighborhoods after a Stanford University study accused them of racial profiling. The result has been "growing disorder," according to an article in the Wall Street Journal. Traffic deaths rose 20% in 2020, with most of the victims black.

It's one thing to say that the Aunt Jemima syrup bottle is demeaning to African Americans, but quite another to say it's okay for them to loot and ignore traffic laws, speeding and passing red lights among the most egregious. Giving criminals of any color a green light on crime can only end in disaster.

Hollywood Mimbos and Bimbos

With all the dastardly things going on in the world, the denizens of Hollywood continue to believe that they are very, very important. They are helped by the media, all of them working in unison to make money, money, and more money. Today's Wall Street Journal, once a dependable source of serious news, devotes three full pages to the upcoming Academy Awards, "Hollywood's most prestigious awards ceremony." 

Yes, despite the pandemic and continuing police brutality and rioting in the streets, this year there will be Oscars handed out. And a Red Carpet upon which the decked out stars will strut their stuff. And many more nominees in all categories, just to be sure that Blacks and Chinese and Japanese and Germans and Koreans and who-knows-who-else will be included, God forbid too many white people win. (What, no Native Americans? Get ready for some protests.)

Who cares? Once upon a time I did. But then I grew up and suddenly which designer's dress Glenn Close is wearing seems like a bitter bad joke. America now has bigger fish to fry, and hopefully dismal ratings of the always overblown telecast will deliver that message to the mimbos and bimbos of Hollywood.

What's So Great About That?

                                                                            Chandan Khanna/Getty Images

THIS MORNING, EVERYONE is jubilant over the verdict regarding the white cop convicted of murdering George Floyd, especially among the black community. They are almost as jubilant as they were when O.J. Simpson, a black man, was found innocent of murdering two white people, which he most assuredly did. Apparently justice is blind, but for many people it's not color blind.

I consider the finding that a policeman in the United States murdered a citizen in cold blood on a public street while onlookers stood by and watched a cause for deep sadness, not joy.

Why is George Floyd Dead?

Street mural in Chicago.

Imagine how nice life would be if everyone just minded their own business. Instead, they mostly mind everyone else's and feel entitled to evaluate it, as if they actually know what's going on, which they don't. 

Right now the focus of our attention is a white policeman on trial for killing a black man. Most awake adults know every detail of the death of George Floyd almost a year ago. The cop kneeled on Floyd's neck for nine minutes and 29 seconds. Not nine and a half minutes, but nine minutes and 29 seconds. This resulted in a lack of oxygen and ultimately caused his death. 

What nobody seems to know or at least talk about is why the cop did it. I would be interested in hearing his motive but the trial is over, the cop never said a word, and now the jury is deliberating. The verdict threatens to blow the country apart. Buildings in several major cities have already been barricaded to protect them from rioters.

I am not excusing the cop. He is evil and should be eliminated from not only the police force but the human race, if you ask me. Still, what was he thinking? Was he delusional? Did he think Floyd was the Devil? Did Floyd remind him of someone from his past who hurt him? Was he getting back at someone? Did being a policeman make him go crazy? Are there other equally crazy cops out there, running around free with weapons at the ready?

Since I know so little I can't speculate. But that doesn't stop most people, who have concluded the white cop must hate all black people. If so, he did a pathetic job of showing it: Just one black man dead, whereas Hitler, who hated the Jews, managed to kill six million of them. Now that was hate.

My Least Favorite Way to Die

Here at the beach in Florida, with so many people frolicking in the waves, it's hard not to think of the movie Jaws. At least it's hard for me, as I am quite impressionable and the image of human legs dangling enticingly like tasty hors d'oeuvres from the shark's point of view has stayed with me since I first saw the classic film in 1975. This keeps me from fully enjoying my time in the surf; getting eaten by a shark is the worst way I can think of to go.

I shared this thought with my husband, who disagreed and insisted that it would be, "a noble and honorable death, part of the grand scheme of life." We then embarked on a conversation about what's the worst way to die. Morbid, yes, but hey, it's good to plan. Mitch thinks getting eaten by a predator is far superior to getting shot by a terrorist or suffering in a hospital ICU, hooked up to tubes on a ventilator. "Predation is the way of the world," says Mitch. And since we have been predators all our life, especially Mitch for whom no day is complete without eating some kind of animal, for us to become prey is "karmically fulfilling."

I countered: Getting shot is over in a flash and likely painless, and in the hospital scenario at least you are in a comfy bed being cared for by professionals. The shark death is almost too gruesome to envision, yet annually in the United States there are 16 such attacks per year, with a fatality every two years.

Forget karma. When I die I want to be in one piece.

Fly the Unfriendly Skies of Covid

If you want to see just how silly the rules for this pandemic are, fly somewhere. 

From the minute we entered the airport in Maine until we finally reached our destination in Florida several cancelled flights later, we were subjected to constant announcements telling us to wear our masks, wash our hands and stay six feet apart from everyone else. This, we learned, was a FEDERAL MANDATE and failure to do so could cost us up to $500, and possibly get us banned from ever flying again.

Once on the plane we were, as usual, packed in like sardines but still reminded over and over about wearing a mask. (So much for social distancing.) 

You couldn't get a drink of water. In fact, one time my husband pulled his mask down to sip from his water bottle and a flight attendant RUSHED OVER and told him "he'd better" put his mask back on.

We were upgraded to First Class, which gave us absolutely nothing. Like flying wasn't already terrible enough.

The Lucky Queen

I haven't written a post in days because I am not the Queen of England, or of any country for that matter, and so I have to do everything for myself, and this week it's been getting ready to go on a trip. And it's on an airplane, which I have not done in a year and a month. Since I'm out of practice packing has been more exhausting than usual, and makes travel barely worthwhile if you ask me, especially since it involves  many hours of being not only squashed into a tiny seat but also face-masked!

If I were Queen of Anywhere, I could just wake up in the morning and get dressed, or be dressed by one of my servants, and go off confident that all my special needs had been seen to by my underlings. They would have packed everything and I could have relaxed all week. But alas, not in this life.

The Queen of England is greatly on my mind because I just finished watching The Crown on Netflix. Then the day after seeing the last episode, Prince Phillip died, her husband of 74 years. I'm pretty sure the Queen did not have to sit on the phone on hold, calling various funeral homes to arrange for his burial. That's another perk of royalty.

I wonder what I forgot.

 

Netflix Series Review: THE CROWN

The Queen flanked by her sister and husband. (Real men don't wear tiaras.)

Halfway through the fourth season of The Crown, a mawkish soap opera with a dash of history thrown in just to make you feel like it's not a total waste of time, I have come to the following conclusions: 1. The Royal Family sucks. 2. The British people are insane. These two facts become evident somewhere around the start of Season 3, but by then you are hooked.

Hooked on what? Seeing the gorgeous sets and fantastic scenery, hearing the very cool music, and gaping at the the outlandish wealth and opulent lifestyle you could not imagine having in your wildest dreams. The acting is pretty good too, in fact some of it is so great that you start hating a lot of the characters.

Having never paid attention to all that stuff, I was shocked to learn how absolutely awful the daily lives of the Royals are. Sure they have 26 different homes (castles and palaces would be more accurate) to live in, and about 50 Rolls Royces, maybe more, to ferry them from one to another when the mood strikes. When it's raining, servants dressed in ridiculous uniforms hold umbrellas over them. They have people who dress them from top to bottom, as they stand motionless like the dummies they are. Servants meet their every need, except for brushing their teeth and wiping their butts on the toilet. (We did have the honor of seeing the Queen on that particular throne two times just to make the point.)

We also get to see the beautiful Princess Diana shoveling food down her gullet like a Christmas goose, then vomiting it all up into the toilet. Yes, she was pretty, but this show highlights her clearly moronic side. Still my husband and I hurry through dinner to see what's next for the Royal Family. It's an addiction for sure, but at least we don't vomit after watching it.

First Chew, Then Swallow

In Fresno, California, admittedly a state populated by half-wits and lunatics, an 18-year-old man is suing, meaning seeking to make money from, after his 41-year old father died from choking as a participant in a taco-eating contest held at a minor league baseball game in 2019. According to the suit, the father "was not told of the risks beforehand" and "no steps were taken by the event organizers to protect him."

Gee, I'm no lawyer and I don't even like tacos, nevertheless I am fully up to speed on the risks of shoving as many tacos down my throat as fast as I can, one after another, in hopes of winning some sort of dumb prize. And I do wonder what steps might have been taken to protect him. Duct tape over the mouth? An IQ test beforehand? 

The fact that a licensed lawyer has taken on this case is further evidence that not only is the general population losing the ability to engage in critical thinking, but today's lawyers are scummier than ever and will do just about anything for a buck. I wonder who I can sue about my debilitating nausea every time I hear that insane cackle emitted by Kamala Harris, her go-to response for every question lobbed at her. Or the sharp pains in my head whenever I see or hear Joe Biden attempt to make sense. Surely some California lawyer will take my case.

America the Insane

Here in America if you are planning on getting a job, boarding an airplane, driving a vehicle, buying alcohol, buying cigarettes, owning a dog, getting married, getting a COVID vaccine, donating blood, opening a bank account, taking a book out of a library, being admitted to a hospital or staying in a hotel, you will have to be prepared to show some sort of personal identification.

However, if you want to vote in a national election you are good to go with the shirt on your back and the flip-flops on your feet. Is this a great country or what?

Facebook Lies

The insidious and rampant falseness of most Facebook posts is incredible. I certainly never write anything remotely near to how I am feeling, this blog post being the exception. Because of my inner darkness I avoid posting anything personal, but many of my friends, or especially former friends, declare sentiments that are so far from how they really feel, or how their lives are really going, it's shocking.

Certainly I would never name names but I'm thinking of people who have terrible marriages and toxic family relationships who post photos of their big, happy families enjoying a wonderful holiday dinner, day out in the country, or whatever. Knowing the real dynamics of who despises who and which characters haven't spoken to one another in months, or even years, takes most of the enjoyment out of it.

If ordinary people who lack important roles in society feel it necessary to put on a false front, I can only imagine the lies presented to us by our politicians and community leaders. There's no punchline here, just an observation that's not at all funny. Sorry for that. But enjoy the cartoons below, some of my favorites!

The Roots of Fat Phobia

Recently I received a note from my friend Ted saying, "You worry way too much about your weight." All I can say to him in response is, "No kidding, tell me something I don't know."

By way of explanation, let me put things this way. Suppose when you were a child your family had a pit bull, or maybe a German shepherd dog. And suppose that every day the dog bit you or terrorized you in some way, and your parents told you to "stay away from the dog" and "don't aggravate the dog," yet did nothing to deal with the dog's aggressive behavior. 

Naturally you would not invite friends to your home for fear they would encounter the dog. And every day and night you could hear your parents arguing about what to do with the dog, how to handle the dog, what to feed the dog, and bought the dog toys to make it happier, but they never got at the root cause of the dog's aggression so nothing changed and in fact got worse as the dog grew larger and got angrier. 

Supposedly you lived with the dog since birth until the age of 19, and finally moved away. Do you think you would like dogs after that? Would you be comfortable around them? How about if your parents warned you constantly, daily, that aggression was a really bad trait to be avoided at all costs? Would you worry about them, or perhaps spend too much time dwelling on how not to become "a dog" yourself?  

Actually we had a really sweet boxer when I was growing up, so I love dogs to this day and have owned several as an adult. In my story, the dog was my older sister and she wasn't only aggressive, she was obese, morose and miserable, and still is. And there you have it.