No Wonder We're All Fat

If the news doesn't improve, and soon, I'm going to need a whole new wardrobe by Christmas. Just today I ate a glazed stick from Dunkin' Donuts, something I never, ever do except under great duress or if I lose a bet. This culinary debauchery came close on the heels of a huge bowl of popcorn (if a bowl of anything can be said to have heels), sprinkled liberally with grated Parmesan cheese. Now I feel sick to my stomach and am filled not only with junk food but also guilt and remorse.

It's all that damn shooter's fault. As the gruesome facts of another mass murder on another college campus slowly come to light, one can hardly do anything but try to assuage the pain. For me it's with food, which is so dumb: Clearly, my eating out of control does nothing for anyone, even me. But it does help to understand why the whole world is getting fatter by the minute. Following are the latest statistics from the World Health Organization as of January 2015:

• Worldwide obesity has more than doubled since 1980.
• In 2014, more than 1.9 billion adults 18 years and older were overweight. Of these, over 600 million were obese.
• Most of the world's population live in countries where being overweight kills more people than being underweight.
• 42 million children under the age of five were overweight or obese in 2013.