Too Much Drama

What cop looks like this? (I want that hair.)

I guess I've seen too many episodes of "Law & Order: SVU." I watch the show mostly for Mariska Hargitay's hair, but still the stories do get in and now my mind rushes to tawdry, twisted plots at a moment's notice. Like today, for instance.

I decided it was time to indulge myself in a rare, infrequent activity: getting a facial. I have done this about three times a year for the last couple of years. It's expensive and unnecessary but still, since I walk around dressed in rags most of the time I'm saving money there, and I love the whole experience. Most of all I really enjoy seeing the woman --no names, it's too risky--who performs the service, in her home which is stunningly beautiful and ultra-relaxing so it's always a treat. She's funny and interesting. The whole thing takes about two hours and it's better than a European vacation, especially if you're going to Barcelona.

The trouble was I lost her phone number in my transfer to a new phone a few weeks ago, so I went online to find it on her website. Which is no longer there. Then I Googled her and found out she was arrested in her home at 5:30 in the morning about a month ago, for an "outsanding warrant." I have no way of finding out what happened, but of course I am assuming the worst, and now I can't believe I ever let her put a hand on me, and me half-naked to boot, with scented candles burning and new-age music tinkling in the background, what with her horrible criminal record and being wanted in several states, and having had several assumed names, and having said online that she studied aesthetics in Paris, France when I know for a fact she has never been out of the country, or maybe she just said that to throw me off the scent. Oy. I mean really, what should I think?

Then I called the friend who led me to her in the first place to see what she knows, and she is not answering her cell or her home phone even though she always does, and she's sort of got some sketchy guy in her life right now and there's a restraining order and....well, you see where I'm going.

Now probably everything is fine and my face lady was arrested for outstanding parking tickets and my friend's cell phone is broken and she's out for the day riding her bike or picking daffodils or something equally wholesome like that. Maybe. But still. She called me earlier today and it only rang once and there was nobody there and I called right back but no answer.

The mind wanders.