Here are two facts that are unrelated, but I am wondering if they should be:1. I recently had an old friend as a house guest for a few days (three-and-a-half, but who's counting).
2. Being an artist, I naturally have some of my work hanging on the walls of my home. Not all that many, actually, when you consider how many paintings I have completed and how many walls I have. But as a former owner of an art gallery, I also own a lot of great art done by other people, so I mostly have their works on display. Still, counting bathrooms, I have about 15 of my own paintings visible to anyone who comes in the house, and about another 15 visible in my art studio which is open to anyone who wants to take a look around. Also visible are many of my beaded works and some painted furniture, including about four chairs and perhaps six small tables. In fact, being in my house is sort of like looking at this page: it's pretty hard not to see the stuff unless you are blind.
Is it wrong to expect that a "friend" would, at some time during those three-and-a-half days, say something about my art? Like maybe even a phony platitude? Or perhaps a mild compliment? Or even an over-the-top compliment? Or even a, "Wow, you've been busy?" But this particular old friend said nothing, until one half-hour before she left, when I went to the trouble of bringing out a couple of my recent works to show her, one of which, shown here, is among my favorites. Here is what she said: "Is that supposed to be a cow? It looks like a pig." (I might have said the same to her, since she has put on so much weight since I last saw her.) 
Anyway, all cattiness aside, I was hurt to say the least and stunned to say the most. My son says I am wrong to feel that way and that most people do not care about other people's hobbies. He says I had wrong expectations of the woman, since I already knew that she doesn't care about art. I say it doesn't matter if she cares about art, and that if she cares about me she should have made at least a cursory nod to how I spend almost 100% of my time.
I am still wondering: just what are friends for?
People only notice what they like. Since you said that she doesn't care for art, I would not have shown her anything. If she made a comment on her own, that is fine. Art is subjective. Even if she liked art, she may have a preference on certain style or medium. If your art makes you feel a certain way, that is all that matters.
ReplyDeleteGL
Friends are for having a relationship with. Your feelings are valid. That's what feelings are, always valid. I am a better friend because I am just now looking at all that you posted here (not enough, where's your website?) and there are quite a few that I really really like.....of course the dog, the black/white table (next to the bottom here)all the sturdy tables, not the half table, and the turquoise landscape, is that water? LOVE it. and the flowers under that scary one of Zack. The one of Z is a little dark (like eerie)so I guess it is also good. I love the beaded bottle I have, it is holding a plant start in my kitchen as we speak. I am so excited that after I hinted about you giving away some cows you said you were going to give ME something. YAY!!! can't wait.
ReplyDelete