Saturday, August 23, 2014

Plea From a Non-Aging Boomer


I just received one of those Mocking Aging Baby Boomer emails. Even though I clearly am one, having been at Woodstock and having gotten maced at an anti-Vietnam war demonstration, I still did not find it funny in the least. The missive consisted of a poorly animated cartoon set to the old song, "Born to be Wild," and showing a husband and wife with all sorts of medical problems trying to recapture their spent youth on a treadmill and exercise bike. He's fat and takes Viagra, she's obnoxious and naggy and worried about his heart giving out.

Maybe it's not funny to me because I am not fat, have no artificial body parts, do not take a million different drugs and still smoke pot. I go to rock concerts, have never played golf, avoid bridge parties and have no idea where a catheter actually goes. While my breasts may have started to, my pelvic floor has not yet dropped, whatever that means. And having robbed the cradle, my husband--also a boomer though a decade younger--is still quite fit, is bald only by choice, is not yet retired, has never ridden on a golf cart and still thinks I'm a babe. (Okay, so maybe he needs glasses.)

So please-- don't send me any more of those videos.

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