Wednesday, April 2, 2014

Hidden Meanings

Euphemisms are everywhere in our culture. To cast the widest net possible, people don't say what they mean, they say what sounds best. I learned just this morning that fast-food joints are now called "quick service restaurants." Of course I've known for years that old ladies are actually "women of a certain age," disobedient children are suffering from "oppositional disorder," and rolls of fat around the waist are "love handles."

Euphemisms aren't new. The best one I ever heard was  back in 1987 when my father was diagnosed with a terminal illness. His doctors called a family meeting to update us on his deteriorating condition. They said that following surgery, one they recommended to insure him "a more comfortable passing," Dad's condition would improve for several months until, ultimately, he would "have a problem."

Me: But he already has a problem--he has colon cancer. What problem do you mean?
Doctor: He will die.

Now that's a problem.

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