The Hormone Free, Gluten Free, Paleo Friendly, Low Glycemic, Dairy Free, Best Sex of Your Life Diet

These days all the rage is to lose weight and look younger and have great sex and eat all you want and most of all, not harm the planet and avoid anything artificial and certainly don't pollute or hurt any animals in the process of becoming a better person. And above all else, eat Paleo. You know, like the cavemen did. Like those cavemen were so great, grunting at each other and inventing fire and scratching symbols into rocks with other rocks.

Through no fault of our own--actually it was my husband's fault since he joined CrossFit and ended up on some mailing list--we started receiving a magazine called Paleo Magazine: Modern Day Primal Living. It is a hoot and I suggest you run right out and get a copy to keep in the bathroom. All the ads for all the fattening foods just have the word Paleo in front of the foods, and then they are healthy. I mean really, what kind of a dummy would eat a regular brownie when he or she could eat a Paleo brownie?

The magazine tells you all about how to live a Paleo lifestyle. In a nutshell, and by the way nuts are very Paleo, this is how: You just say something about cave men or being primal or evolution or lacking gluten first, then eat it. Here are a few examples from ads in the magazine:

Delicious Paleo meals delivered right to your door, made with organic foods and primal integrity!

Release your Inner Caveman and evolve into your potential with our 100% Paleo diet-compliant Beef Jerky

Paleo Wraps: A convenient, tortilla alternative for your Paleo Lifestyle (shelf life nine months).

Primal Care Skin Balm is totally biologically compatible with your skin and has only two ingredients: Tallow from grass-fed buffalo and organic jojoba oil.

There are also ads for the following products: Paleo Eats; Paleo Simplified Energy Bar; Primal Pit Paste: The all-natural deodorant, killing the odor without killing your body; Caveman Cookies; Paleo Treats (not to be confused with Paleo Eats); Paleo Pasta; Steve's Paleogoods; Paleo Bread--Fulfills your craving for bread while living a Paleo lifestyle; Paleo People--Snacks you can evolve with; Paleo on the Go, delivering Gourmet Paleo Meals; and the Stone Age Diner.

Besides promoting a healthy, Paleo lifestyle, the magazine is also quite educational. For example, who knew cavemen used deodorant? I for one did not.