Making Money

I have never made a dime off of blogging. This irks me. So this morning, when I read a "Tips and Quips" column for bloggers and it stated quite boldly that "earning money from your blog is easy-peasy," I took note. I read on and finally  concluded that in order to realize financial reward from my writing, I'll have to use phrases like  "tips & quips" instead of "helpful suggestions" and "easy-peasy" instead of "simple and straightforward." I have never been that sort of writer, and if I ever become that kind of writer I am hereby suggesting in advance, and in front of witnesses, that that my husband shoot me.

One of those tips concerning how to earn money off your blog is to post ads on it. I have tried this ploy before. In fact, one week I earned $2.38, but I was so nauseous and a little embarrassed by seeing the ads posted there that the financial reward had little positive impact. (Of course, how could it, since having $2.38 is not all that different from having absolutely nothing.) Anyway, I deplore and despise all advertising. When ads rear their ugly heads I look away, change the channel, press the mute button or whatever is necessary to blot out the inane bullshit dreamed up in those meetings of Coke-filled and coke-filled creative types. The things they say! The lies they tell! And besides, I can figure out for myself what shampoo to use or which car insurance to get, I certainly don't need advice from an imaginary talking gecko on either score.

Admittedly, I'm not much of a money-maker. I have had brief forays into success, but despite the initial rush of exhilaration, I always end up just as broke as at the outset. I assume this is simply who I am this time around.  Fortunately my husband is blessed with the ability to generate income just by opening his mouth and sharing his thoughts, so I am kept fed and clothed. Anyway, please excuse the ads on this post, I'll try anything twice.