Do the Right Thing

Illustration by Danny Hellman

Imagine you are the current president of the United States. Secretly you support a particular issue--say gay marriage to pick something at random -- but you fear that by condoning it you will turn off many people you actually disagree with but who still control a lot of votes. This is a problem. You really want to make a difference, and your opponent is clearly against the hypothetical issue in question, so you know if he wins the election you will have lost this opportunity to right a wrong. But you also really want to get re-elected so you can continue to fly around the world for free in your own fancy private jet, eat fabulous foods cooked by celebrity chefs for free, throw big parties at your house and invite anyone you want, never have to look for parking, meet tons of Hollywood celebrities and have them think you are cool, play a lot of golf whenever and wherever you damn well please, dress your wife in fancy designer dresses at no cost to you, never carry a wallet and go to Martha's Vineyard a couple more times on the taxpayer's dime. Oy, such a dilemma!

Suddenly the time of re-election is drawing nigh and the people are clamoring for an answer. You would do one of the following:
1. Change the law while you still have the power to do so. Feel good about yourself and confident that you made the right decision, knowing that if you did nothing else of merit during your entire administration, at least you did that.
2. Start dangling the promise of changing the law in front of the voters, saying things like "our work is not finished" and "things will get better in 2013," hoping that they will bring you back for a second chance to do it, even though you have had over three years to do it and you haven't done it.
3. Send your lackey, the vice-president, on a speaking tour to clarify that you really, really are in favor of it and that you really, really will make it legal in 2013, right after they re-elect you.

This is American politics at its worst and most obvious.