Film Review: RISE OF THE PLANET OF THE APES

Choosing today, a rainy Sunday, for one of our rare trips to the movies, my husband and I saw the latest blockbuster movie raking in dough for its producers. Even though the popcorn wasn't great and the theater smelled sort of funny, we were not disappointed: Rise of the Planet of the Apes grabbed us from the first frame, and we stayed pretty much grabbed until the final credits. It's not all just monkey business, however, so leave the little kids at home. Besides the intense violence and considerable bloodshed, most of which I missed because my hands were over my eyes, there's a tearjerker of a script that is heartbreaking, having to do with letting go of your children and watching your parents die. I saw the film two hours ago and I'm still sniffling.

It's all about an adorable baby chimp that grows into a not so adorable and very pissed-off ape, capable of despicable deeds and yet with a heart as big as Texas, reminding us that the movie was made in Hollywood after all. Despite all the phony baloney, of which there is plenty, you buy into it because so much of what transpires is true: Money-grubbing pharmaceutical companies really do render animals helpless and perform hideous experiments on them, all for man's benefit. Manufactured weapons really do allow us to dominate creatures that are naturally stronger and more powerful than we are. Animals are kept caged in zoos across America, living wasted lives of quiet desperation, all for man's enjoyment. It's tough to watch. I'm pretty sure I am now a vegetarian.

The fun part is the ape prison break, during which the hateful human guard who enjoys torturing our hero finally gets his comeuppance via a water hose. Free at last, all the computer-generated monkeys storm the Golden Gate Bridge on their way to eternal peace and happiness in the great outdoors, intent on climbing those giant redwoods in the California sunshine--at least those who aren't killed by San Francisco's finest shooting at them from helicopters. When it comes right down to it, apes are just like people: All they really want is to have a nice day.