Everyone Sucks in Their Own Way

"Hey, look at me! Look what I did! Look where I went! Better yet, look where I am right now!!!! Aren't I cool? Isn't my life so much better than yours? I am fabulous and having so much more fun than you. So what if I'm drunk and stoned most of the time? What's a little DUI citation compared to how much fun I'm having? And hey, look at my grandkids--aren't they amazing? I mean really, aren't they just so unbelievably adorable?!!"

That's Facebook in a nutshell. In fact, the whole social media thing is all so self-congratulatory, I'm sorry I can't vomit. (It's too disgusting so I just don't do it.) Yeah, yeah, I know what you're thinking: "But Andrea, you write this blog and it's pretty much got to do with you and your thoughts and experiences. What about that?" Well excuse me for being human. Yes, I admit it: I also suck, and believe me I hate it. 

Talking animals would make life so much easier.

Have you ever played that game with yourself about if you had three wishes what would they be? Here are mine:
      1. I wish God had a Facebook page and could post His opinions about all the crap people write. Also, He could tell us what He's up to (i.e., "God checked in here an hour ago" and it would be a diner somewhere) and give us the real story about global warming.
      2. I wish all animals could talk, or at least my cat.
      3. I wish I didn't suck.