What if I hadn't been kidnapped by a stranger when I was four?
What if I never saw my six-year-old playmate
hanging by his bathroom belt
from a shower rod
when I was nine?
Would I be happier today?
Might I have been a better mother?
What if I hadn't spent twenty years
running through the city streets on cement?
Would I still need hip replacement surgery right now?
What if I hadn't married my first husband and moved to Washington, DC?
Would I have met my second husband?
Would I ever live in Maine?
So many what ifs.
So many possibilities.
We struggle to gain control, to keep control, to not lose control.
But really, our lives are little more
than one chance occurrence
piled onto another.