Thursday, November 12, 2015

We Need Mitt!

Mitt, oh Mitt -- where are you? Your time is now. Save the Republicans!

Mitt Romney is a smart, politically experienced, kind family man with a love of country and a vision of America as a leader once again. As for scandals, I doubt there is even one skeleton in his closet. His wife would make a great First Lady; besides being lovely she has MS, giving her full rights to sympathy instead of jealousy. And in case you missed it, the last debate among the candidates currently in the running made it clear that each one has a fatal problem---or two or three:

Marco Rubio is Cuban so we are supposed to like him because immigrants are so in these days. But his ultra-canned and over-rehearsed glibness can also be seen as slick and oily, which might explain why I always call him Mario by mistake, thinking of the video game's Super Mario.

Ted Cruz is also of Cuban descent but exploits it less.  He looks exactly like the original model for the Greek Mask of Tragedy. The more I hear him the better I like him, but let's be real: anyone against gay marriage has no chance. (That ship has sailed.)

Chris Christie is fat and that is that. Too many jokes about that would impair his ability to govern.

 John Kasich is whiny and annoying. Enough with "My father was a postman" already, a statement he manages to work in to almost every sentence he utters. Just how does that make him the right choice to run the country anyway?

Carly Fiorina lost my support during the last debate when she revealed her new hair color. Who needs a president who is busy fussing with her hair?

Jeb Bush is wimpy. He looks like Robin Williams in Mrs. Doubtfire, and also my Aunt Peska. I suppose in these days of transgenders being so popular that might be a good thing, but I find it distracting.

Donald Trump is played. Still funny and real, he just does not know what the heck he is talking about a lot of the time.

Ben Carson has a sweet personality, is 100% black and not just half like Obama, and seems very honest and very smart. But really, he's got to wake up. He should have some coffee or something.

Rand Paul looks like a leprechaun or a creature out of Lord of the Rings. I swear he is not human.

Bobby Jindal is too skinny, Huckabee's ears are too big and anyone else who is running is too forgettable since I don't remember who they are.


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