Sunday, January 30, 2011

Hoosiers: Who Knew?


Quick—tell me everything you know about Indiana. If you’re anything like me, that will take about two minutes. Here’s what I came up with: The natives are called Hoosiers. They have a team called the Indiana Pacers. It is the home of a famous racecar race, the Indianapolis 500. I think they grow corn there, but don’t quote me—could be soybeans or wheat. (Definitely a vegetable.) “Gary, Indiana” was a catchy tune from "The Music Man," a Broadway show. That’s all I got.

Forgive me, but I was born in Brooklyn, raised on Long Island and educated at NYU in Manhattan. If this set of circumstances, or something similar, did not happen to you, then you might not know this ugly truth: Children growing up in New York are told that everything else pales in comparison! “If you can make it here you can make it anywhere” is a standard lullaby. No place else matters. Truly, this is what they tell us. And we believe it.

With this undercoating of sophistication--a pedigree, so to speak, guaranteeing me lifetime hipness no matter where I am--I then moved to Washington, D.C. and Salt Lake City and Berkeley and Baltimore and ultimately Freeport, Maine.  Still, people have always asked, are you from New York? I proudly answer yes, even though they are probably thinking, “what an asshole.” (I know New Yorkers are not universally loved, although we are feared, which has its own advantages.)

Long story short: I’ve never been to Indiana. Not only have I never been there but I never even wanted to go there--why would I? I’ve traveled outside the country many times, but nobody ever suggested Indiana as a vacation destination. I am not even exactly sure where it is although I suspect somewhere in the middle. So it was with very few, and admittedly low, expectations that I accompanied my husband to dinner with a couple of Hoosiers the other night: a colleague and his wife, all of us in Chicago for a “work thing.” 

I sort of expected hayseeds-- like I would not have been stunned if the wife was wearing something gingham. Instead, she had on some wild fur vest which I immediately coveted, and she was way cooler-looking than me. In fact, the two of them were extremely cool and very friendly, very smart, very fun people. I enjoyed them immensely, so much more than about a million people I can think of, some from sophisticated places like Chicago and Detroit and New Jersey!  They are my new best friends.

I decided that maybe my whole problem in life thus far is that I have never been to Indiana. Who knew? God only knows what else I’m doing wrong.

4 comments:

  1. Though I've never been to Indiana, (I hear the 3 Dog Night as I'm typing this) I have been to Iowa, Dubuque to be exact, and had the same reaction as you did to Indianans. Man, did I lead a sheltered life.

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  2. I am happy for you but so sad I wasn't there too.....

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  3. We missed you terribly! The whole time we were in Chicago we were remembering our trip with you and your evil husband....like, "this is where we had that big fight with Art," and "this is where Art stopped talking to us".....

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  4. David Letterman is from Indiana!

    Jackie

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